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Party City

Posted on March 11, 2010 Written by Tonya

It has been a magical first year…so far, we still have three months to go and I can’t wait to celebrate! What they say is true about having children, the days are long, but the years are short. You were once, not so long ago, a tiny newborn and now you are a growing, learning, changing, on-the-go, toddler and this has been the best year of my life.

Back to the celebration part…

I was surprised recently to overhear fellow moms already planning their soon-to-be one year old’s birthday parties and down right shocked at how elaborate these plans sounded. What, I don’t understand I thought to myself, what is there to plan? Place your pride and joy in their highchair, let him go crazy with a cupcake, take a dozen cute photos for the baby book and toast your partner to a job well down. Hip hip hooray, you all three survived the first year!

I don’t believe that children’s birthday parties need to be huge, over the top affairs or include entertainment in the form of hiring the Wiggles, a man on tilts or renting a bouncy castle. Why do parents do this to themselves? Who needs that pressure? When did birthday parties get so out of hand?

Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE birthdays and I think they should always be celebrated so that birthday boy or girl, no matter what their age, feels extra special on their special day. For a one year old, that can be done simply; at home, surrounded by family members, cake and ice cream and balloons. Even when you are old enough to have real friends to invite to a party, it doesn’t need to be a ton of work or super expensive to be memorable or fun. Otherwise, it’s an event for the adults, especially if alcohol is being served. 😉

When I was growing up I only remember having one some what bigger than usual birthday party and it was for my Sweet Sixteen. It was a blast! My mom had designed a scavenger hunt and got all of her friends in our neighborhood to participate. It was great fun, but it was also held a full month and a half before my actual birthday because I have a birthday that falls right smack dab in the middle of summer, when everyone I knew was on vacation, including me and my family. We might run into that with you too, since you are also a June baby. I’m sorry!

My birthdays growing up usually consisted of having my favorite meal for lunch (a Kid’s Meal at Burger King…such a treat!) or dinner (my mom’s lasagna, which is always better the next day) and then going to a movie of my choice with my mom. Great days!

At any rate, birthdays are suppose to be fun and not contests to see who can outdo each other. Needless to say, we don’t have any plans yet for your big first birthday, but I know they will include family, lots of photos and a hose. 🙂

The best is yet to be.

Day 16/100

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Strike A Pose

Posted on February 22, 2010 Written by Tonya

I haven’t walked into a Sears in years. Okay, I take that back…over the holidays I was on the hunt for an ugly Christmas sweater for a party that we were invited to and I thought, if anyone would have one, Sears would. No luck. It turns out that they have really upped their game, but back to the point of my post.

Sears is an institution and has been around since 1925. I remember many trips there as a child to try on shoes, match up my Granimals, look at new washing machines with my mom, or buy a new hammer or other tool with my dad. Sears carries it all. Plus, what child born in the 70’s doesn’t remember drooling over the behemoth Sears catalog at Christmastime? Oh, how I enjoyed going through page by page to come up with my ‘wish list’.

Growing up, Sears is also the place that my mom took me to have my portraits taken from time to time. Looking through my baby book, it’s filled with pictures taken at Sears. They must have had a promotion running, where you can buy one photo and get a second one for free with no sitting fees. That’s the same package I signed up for on Saturday after buying almost $400 worth of other shots! And you thought Sears was inexpensive. Me too! 🙂

Here are a couple of photos from your first Sears Portrait Studio session:

No baby book would be complete without a formal picture taken in overalls. The little dog in this shot was a gift from the hotel staff in Florence. You love this toy!

Blue eyes…enough said!

Wardrobe change. You can’t crawl yet, but you can stand very well with support. I am off camera to the right of you, just in case.

I should add that it was after your photo shoot that you fell off a child size chair in the waiting area and not only bumped your head, but also somehow got a major scratch on your nose. Oops! I felt terrible, but was glad it was after your pictures had been taken.

The best is yet to be.

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Fashion Icons

Posted on February 17, 2010 Written by Tonya

I am smart enough to know that even though I may love a dress that Jennifer Aniston is wearing, fall over myself (literally and figuratively) over a pair of stilettos that Victoria Beckham is in and have to contain my excitement over a daring Carrie Bradshaw ensemble, these looks aren’t going to work on me. I just couldn’t pull them off as effortlessly. I’d kill to have Jennifer Aniston’s body though.

Audrey Hepburn
Grace Kelly
Katharine Hepburn

These are my fashion icons.

These women are legendary. They are known the world over for their sense of style, grace and of course, acting in some of Hollywood’s most memorable films; Breakfast at Tiffany’s, Rear Window and The Philadelphia Story respectively. And in Katharine’s case, for pushing the envelope and making it acceptable for women to wear pants. Thanks, KH!

I grew up watching these women because my father was a huge fan of old Hollywood classic black-and-white films. I learned to love these movies and even at an early age, I knew that there was something very special about these women that made them worth admiring and emulating.

I also learned to love these classic movies and I miss watching them with my dad. They are smart, witty, and sometimes suspenseful. The lead actress is always gorgeous.

Their clean, classic, flawless style remind me to keep it simple. They didn’t over exude their sexuality, instead they exuded intelligence and class from every pore.

I mostly go for comfort when dressing, especially now that I have a baby. I love flats, jeans, cardigans, T-shirts, pearls, tan, black, navy, white, and the less is more philosophy. I love capped sleeves, stripes, boat necks, layering and well-worn shoes. These days, I live in lululemon yoga pants, tank tops and hoodies.

I believe at the end of the day, however, you can make a potato sack look good if you combine it with confidence, a smile and a little bit of mystery.

You are going to have to consult with your dad on men’s fashions. I am sure he’ll have a thing or two to say about Steve McQueen, a fashion icon in his own right.

The best is yet to be.

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Hopes, Dreams & Wishes

Posted on February 12, 2010 Written by Tonya

Long before I ever thought I’d even have children and certainly long before I had you, I bought this little sweater. I found it at Old Navy, of all places. It was originally $16.50 and had been marked down to $3.99. The tag is still on it.

I thought it was adorable. Navy blue is my favorite color and I loved the heart with the arrow going through it. Something came over me and I just had to have it. I remember thinking at the time, I’m no where near ready to have children, why on earth am I buying this?!?

It’s simple and sweet really. This tiny little sweater represented something stupendous and wonderful to me. It represented where my life was going to be someday. Where my life, if I was lucky enough, was heading… True love, romance, marriage, children, baby clothes, bottles, blankets, giggles and a lifetime of memorable firsts and happy moments.

The sweater stayed safely wrapped in tissue paper in the back of my pajama drawer for years and Valentine’s Day always reminds me that I have it. Until now, I have only shared it with one person…your daddy.

It’s a bit too girly for you and I don’t think you’d fit into anyway, it’s a size 3-6 months, but it hangs in your closet, as a reminder to me of my hopes and dreams and wishes and the realization that they have come true.

I love you, baby. Happy Valentine’s Day!

The best is yet to be.

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The Spirit Of Christmas

Posted on December 16, 2009 Written by Tonya

My mother loved Christmastime and our house was always decked out for the holidays. She is the reason Hallmark exists! We always had a beautiful tree covered with colorful international treasures from our life overseas and all the traveling we had done together. She loved snow globes and nativity scenes and every year one whole couch would be completely covered with her motley crew of Christmas guys (stuffed animals dressed in red and green). She had Christmas dishes strewn about the house filled with holiday candy and would have enough baked goods on hand to guarantee at least a three to five pound weight gain after each visit. She was a big fan of the Christmas letter (writing and receiving them) and she loved shopping for our holiday cards and stationary the day after Christmas for the following year. I remember many 5:00 AMs on December 26 rifling through bins of picked over greeting cards to find enough boxes for everyone on her and my father’s Christmas list. I swear they sent 300 cards!

I miss my mother every day but especially during the holiday season. She made Christmas special with her childlike enthusiasm and overall joy.

My dad, on the other hand was the exact opposite. Sure, he loved the Christmas cookies, but growing up, his family would put up their Christmas tree the day before Christmas and take it down the day after, or so he said. He would often tell my mom to buy what she wanted and he would wrap it and put it under the tree. Over the years, he started to get into it more and I think even began to enjoy picking out gifts for all of us and eventually came to understand the element of surprise, however, his wrapping always left a lot to be desired! See picture above; that is VHS tape wrapped around a present. My dad also had a vast collection of holiday music and liked to play it constantly the week of Christmas.

One of my favorite family holiday traditions on Christmas day was after all the presents were opened and prominently displayed in front of the tree (another tradition), we would go to a movie. Many big blockbusters open on Christmas day and we had fun trying to agree on which one to see. After the movie we would come home and make leftover turkey sandwiches and each have a slice of pie. Chocolate pudding for me, pumpkin for my dad, and pecan for my mom and sister.

This will be my third Christmas without my parents and it is very different now; and for me it has lost some of the magic. My in-laws have done their best to include me and my sister in their holiday, but I am looking forward to creating new traditions with Lucas and hopefully seeing some of that lost Christmas spirit shine through him.

The best is yet to be.

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“Girl” Has Never Been My Strong Suit

Posted on December 9, 2009 Written by Tonya

I have never been a girly girl. Sure, I wear (minimal) make-up and perfume (when I remember), like flowers and get my nails done every two weeks, but pink is not my favorite color, I don’t enjoy shopping all that much, my husband has way more shoes than I do and even though I own a couple pairs of stilettos, I can’t walk in them to save my life. I am most comfortable in jeans and sneakers and sometimes enjoy a cold beer over wine. To be honest, most of the time I still feel like I am struggling with my femininity like an awkward prepubescent teen, but I try.

Because I don’t think I do “girl” very well, when I found out that I was pregnant with a boy, I was overjoyed! I think men are very cool. I love how no nonsense they are about life. Girls are way too complicated, to put it mildly.

Friends and total strangers alike are always telling me how great raising boys is; “Boys are wonderful,” “Boys are so much better/easier/funner than girls,” “Boys love their mothers differently than girls.” A lot of this remains to be seen since you are only six months old, but I am very excited to be the mom of a boy and raising a little gentleman.

I’m looking forward to rough and tumble play, pockets full of marbles, bugs, rocks and dirt, cheering you on from the stands at baseball/football/soccer/basketball games, teaching you how to slow dance (I’ve been told I like to lead, so I should be pretty good at that), tie a tie and pull out a chair. I also can’t wait to have a beer with you, of course, I’ll probably have to share that outing with your dad.

For now, I am enjoying right where we are. Although, I must admit, now that my life is full of everything blue, brown or striped, has wheels and makes a lot of noise, a little pink might be nice.

The best is yet to be…bring on the farting, belching, boogers, and scratching.

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My ipod Has Schizophrenia

Posted on October 14, 2009 Written by Tonya

I believe that everything is better with music and I love all different types; from bubble gum pop and jazz to Jay-Z and Radiohead (okay, Radiohead is one of your dad’s favorite bands, not mine, but I do have a two of their songs on my iPod).

Music is an incredibly powerful thing; it has the ability to uplift and motivate like nothing else. Just the right tune can put a smile on my face, a spring in my step, a wish in my heart or tear in my eye. It can make a long boring car ride more bearable and household chores dare I say, more fun to power through. It gives me that little extra something to go another few minutes on the treadmill.

I play music for you everyday. I have 15 days or 5316 songs on my iPod, so there is A LOT to choose from. My Essential playlist (otherwise known as the playlist of music I would have to have were I ever to find myself stranded on a deserted island and could only take one playlist), which you have probably listened to the most, includes 100 of my all time favorite songs. It is as eclectic as the rest of my music library. The first 10 songs are:

1. Ghost In You – The Psychedelic Furs
2. Rump Shaker – Wreckx-N-Effect
3. Melissa – The Allman Brothers Band
4. Anna Begins – Counting Crows
5. Love – Matt White
6. Peek-A-Boo – Sioxsie and the Banshees
7. Theme from “A Summer Place” – The Lettermen
8. Hallelujah – k.d. lang
9. Pig – Dave Matthews Band
10. Crazy – Patsy Cline

Each song is gorgeous, haunting and fun in their own special way. I think you can figure out which is which. 🙂

Music to me is like the sense of smell for others. It helps trigger a memory and hearing a certain song can bring me right back to that moment in time. For example, “Drive” by The Cars was my first slow dance, “Fade Into You” by Mazzy Star was the song playing on the radio when I got into my first(!) car accident, “Just Like Heaven” by The Cure will always remind me of dancing the night away in Newport Beach with my college roommate and our boyfriends, “You are the Sunshine of My Life” by Stevie Wonder is the song my sister sang at my wedding and “Addicted to Love” by Robert Palmer will always make me think of my dad. Actually, a lot of songs remind me of my dad, but that one in particular. He couldn’t get enough of the video featuring the scantily clad long legged chicks.

I am not a very good dancer, but I can carry a tune and you sure seem to like it when I start to move and groove and belt out with the chorus. I hope I am instilling in you an appreciation for music, if not a move or two you may bust out later in life.

The best is yet to be.

Family

Posted on October 10, 2009 Written by Tonya

Family is so important.

Growing up, I didn’t spend very much time with my extended family. My father’s father died before I was born and his mother died when I was seven. On my mother’s side, her parents died while I was in college and her brother just after I graduated from college. I certainly remember a few visits with them, as well as cousins, aunts and uncles, but not nearly as many I should.

Living overseas like we did, it was difficult for my parents to “make the rounds” to see everyone during the summertime when we would be stateside. Now that I’m older and especially now that I have a child of my own, I wish they had made it a greater priority.

After my parents died, I realized how out of touch I had become with my extended family and it made me very sad. I have been trying to make up for it by reaching out more. Thanks to Facebook, I have reconnected with all of my cousins and I make a point of calling my aunts and uncles as often as I can. I know they all feel guilty too, but it happens…distance, schedules, work obligations, life.

Families are our history, our present and our future. They connect us. They divide us. I want you to know your family and spend as much time with them as you can.

Earlier this week your grandparents were in town for their fifth visit and right now my aunt and uncle (one of my father’s older brothers and his wife) are here. While being around them is bittersweet because almost everything my uncle says or does makes me miss my own father, I am so delighted that they are here. They are your family.

The best is yet to be.

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Bibliophilia

Posted on October 4, 2009 Written by Tonya

I don’t know if it’s because both my parents were educators, because they read to me as a child, or because I loved (and love) hanging out at bookstores and libraries, but my first word was “book”.

I read to you everyday. Sadly, aside from children’s books and parenting reference guides, I haven’t done much leisure reading since you were born. I love reading and I miss it very much. There is nothing better than getting lost in a good book. Historical fiction modern day fiction are suspense novels are my favorite.

I love how books can transport you to another place and time and introduce you to interesting characters that you don’t normally encounter in your day-to-day life. I enjoy the relaxation of reading, especially when hours have passed and I don’t even realize it because I’m so enthralled in a good book. Sitting quietly with a juicy epic is truly one of life’s greatest pleasures and brings me a lot of peace.

My Book Facts:

I am a founding member of a book club called JUGS (Just Us Girls) that my friends and I started almost seven (!) years ago and I live for our monthly meetings. Our discussions are always lively, fun and thought provoking. If it weren’t for our group, there are many books I would have missed out on.

I will never start a book without finishing it, no matter how much I may want to throw it into the fireplace (i.e. Saving Graces, a terrible JUGS selection).

I always start books in bed.

One of my very best friends is in my life today because we initially bonded over books. Thank goodness for Kay Scarpetta!

Since 1999, I have kept a list of every book I have read maintaining an average of 35books per year. My father also kept a list of the books he read and I often turn to it for recommendations.

My Top 10 favorite books (in no particular order) are:
1. The Other Boleyn Girl by Philippa Gregory
2. The Time Traveler’s Wife by Audrey Niffenegger
3. A Tree Grows in Brooklyn by Betty Smith
4. The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini
5. The Pact: A Love Story by Jodi Picoult
6. The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald
7. The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold
8. To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee
9. Sarah’s Key by Tatiana de Rosnay
10. Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen

Love her or hate her, I believe Oprah Winfrey single-handedly got our nation reading again when she established her book club in 1996. I am currently reading her latest selection, Say You’re One of Them by Uwem Akpan and so far it’s fabulous.

Quotes I have collected about books and reading:

“To live in the world without becoming aware of the meaning of the world is like wandering about in a great library without touching the books.” – Anonymous

“A room without books is like a body without a soul.” – Cicero

“I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book. – Groucho Marx

“Each time we re-read a book we get more out of it because we put more into it. A different person is reading it, and therefore it is a different book.” – Murial Clark

“You are the same today that you are going to be in five years from now except for two things: the people with whom you associate and the books you read.” – Charles Jones

“Once you have read a book you care about, some part of it is always with you.” – Louis L’Amour

“The more that you read, the more things you will know. The more that you learn, the more places you will go.” – Dr. Seuss

“Do your bit to save humanity from lapsing back into barbarity by reading all the novels you can.” – Richard Hughes

“To read a writer is for me not merely to get an idea of what he says, but to go off with him, and travel in his company.” – Andre Gide

“Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.” – P. J. O’Rourke

My personal favorite:

“With freedom, books, flowers, and the moon, who could not be happy?” – Oscar Wilde

Ah, so many books, so little time!

The best is yet to be…one page at a time.

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Baby Free Hours

Posted on September 27, 2009 Written by Tonya

Your dad spent most of the day with you today solo while I spent literally hours trying to figure out what to do with myself.

After taking a very long, very hot shower, in which I loofahed my entire body and shaved areas that have been hairy for far too long, I added three more mommy blogs to follow to my list, read through every What To Expect The First Year e-mail newsletter I have received in the last three weeks and then realized that the only books on my bedside table are: On Becoming Baby Wise, The Happiest Baby on the Block, The No-Cry Sleep Solution and Trees Make the Best Mobiles. Agh! Is this really what my life has come to? Is absorbing mommy information the only thing that I’m interested in nowadays?

It is hard to recall what I used to do with all of my free time before baby, but that doesn’t mean I don’t miss it or think about it longingly. I think I had hobbies, didn’t I? I vaguely remember reading novels and flipping through glossy magazines for hours on end, watching movies from start to finish in one sitting, enjoying leisurely lunches with friends, having meaningful conversations with your dad that didn’t involve the words “poop”, “melt down” or “nap”, pushed myself to the limit in hard core work outs, took last minute trips to Vegas and Palm Springs and indulged in many guilt free glasses of wine, oh yes and sleep.

I suppose my old interests aren’t gone completely or forgotten, they’ve just expanded to include the most important activity in my life right now, which is raising little you.

When given some me time, why was I at such a loss for what to do today?

I finally just got in the car and drove. I ended up taking myself to lunch and then walked around our local farmer’s market for 45 minutes (something I have wanted to do since we lived here) and got some beautiful produce and fresh flowers; then thank goodness my favorite spa takes last minutes appointments, I got a facial. After that, I spent a glorious hour wandering around the bookstore looking up, you guessed it, baby information! I couldn’t help it, I instantly gravitated towards the Parenting section.

All in all, it was a truly rejuvenating afternoon and not a bad way to spend a few baby free hours by myself.

The best is yet to be.

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Party City

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