Our day started much too early.
That’s no excuse.
Play with me.
I was short.
I was preoccupied. With what? My “To Do” list for the day? The thoughts in my head? The laundry? It could all wait. Facebook status updates? Who really cares? The latest move in my Words With Friends game? Please.
Can we go the park?
Too hot.
The beach then!?!
Too much work.
Let’s play Go Fish!
Ugh.
What about Candyland or Connect Four? Uno?
Double ugh!
Why do dogs have tails? Can I paint my finger nails sometime? When can I have gum? What’s your new favorite color? When are we going to see my cousins again? Do I have school tomorrow? What about the day after? Are airplanes or trains faster? Can I have a snack? Why don’t we have strawberries? Can you buy some? Do you know where my Francesco is?
Oh. My. God. The never ending questions!
I was tired and it wasn’t even 9:00 AM. What am I going to do with this kid for the next 10 hours?
Mom, watch this!
I doled out simple tasks to keep him busy. I asked him to line up his cars, help me unload the dryer, throw this away, take that to the other room, let the dog out of his crate, etc.
Peace and quiet in two minute increments.
Can I watch a show?
One show turned into six. Three hours of television. That’s at least two more hours of screen time than we like him to have on a daily basis. My ultimate personal definition of bad/lazy/neglectful parenting.
Mom, sit with me.
It was an extremely long day; one where the minutes deliberately ticked by and mocked me. I couldn’t help but stare at the clock and will time to move forward.
My husband got home and mercifully took over as I busied myself in the kitchen washing up dinner dishes and beating myself up.
And still…. even though I was feeling incredibly guilty, but knowing the next day would be different, knowing I would have another chance to be better, knowing the promise that comes with a new day, what does my sweet son say to me when I kiss him goodnight?
You are the best mommy in the whole world.
Tears.