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If You Had Told Me 10 Years Ago…

Posted on June 24, 2013 Written by Tonya

If you had told me 10 years ago that…

I wouldn’t have a full time job, but would be getting paid to write,

both my parents would be dead and it would take me the better part of five years to sell their house,

I’d be the mother to a four year old,

I’d be battling secondary infertility and sharing my story in my own column,

I would consider going to the grocery store alone a mini vacation,

my family would be living in an apartment,

we’d own a dog,

my sister would live less than an hour away,

I’d be walking on average 600 miles a year (usually with the dog),

I’d be playing more games of Words With Friends than reading,

my closest friends would (thank God) remain the same,

and I’d be blogging,

I would have grabbed the closest chair or wall to steady myself and then told you were absolutely nuts!

It’s true, my life has been a combination of crazy, wonderful, sad and magical. I have experienced the highest of highs and the lowest of lows over the last 10 years and in all honesty, I wouldn’t change a single thing.

Do you live with regrets?

Old School Blogging: ABC’s

Posted on June 7, 2013 Written by Tonya

Old School Blogging is back and this month’s topic is ABC’s. Elaine of The Miss Elaine-ous Life is hosting with Jennifer and if you’re looking for some blogging inspiration, link up!

A. Attached or Single?
Very much attached.

B. Best Friend?
I know I’m expected to say my husband and he is the person I am closest to, but I have amazing girlfriends too and my favorites are the ones that lift me up, make me laugh while supporting me in all that I do.

C. Cake or pie?
Cake. I ate six slices at a wedding once.

D. Day of choice?
Monday. I know I’m in the minority on this one, but I like fresh starts and beginnings.

E. Essential Item?
iPhone.

F. Favorite color?
Navy blue.

G. Gummy bears or worms?
Haribo GoldBears and there is a bag in my purse right now.

H. Hometown?
I grew up overseas and don’t really have a “hometown”, but I currently live in Newport Beach, California.

I. Favorite Indulgence?
Working out followed by a chocolate, almond croissant that I don’t have to share with a soul (or vice versa, probably the smarter way to enjoy the latter).

J. January or July?
January for the same reason I love Mondays (see D.).

K. Kids?
One awesome little boy.

Taken yesterday on my little buddy’s fourth birthday!

L. Life isn’t complete without?
Books, laughter, wine, my son, travel…

M. Marriage date?
August 4, 2007.

N. Number of brothers/sisters?
One sister.

O. Oranges or Apples.
Both please, but I eat a Granny Smith almost every day.

P. Phobias?
Can’t think of any off hand. I wouldn’t like to be locked in a room with them, but I really don’t mind spiders or snakes.

Q. Quotes?
For as long as I can remember, I have loved and collected quotes. Choosing a favorite is downright impossible, but I have always liked this one very much:

Click on image for source.

R. Reasons to smile?
My son, of course, a new episode of Man Men, having dinner made for me, the feeling I get after a great workout and a sleeping puppy at my feet.

S. Season of choice?
Summer.

T. Tag 5 People.
How about 4? Coreen, Katie, Natalie, Poppy.

U. Unknown fact about me?

V. Vegetable?
Any but beans. I’m really into Brussel sprouts right now.

W. Worst habit?
Speeding and occasionally texting in the car (it’s illegal in California).

X. Xray or Ultrasound?
Oooh… ultrasounds!

Y. Your favorite food?
Anything but pie.

Z. Zodiac sign?
Cancer. My birthday is this month!

Come play along! Copy and paste the questions here, write your post and link up with Elaine!

What’s In Your Purse?

Posted on June 3, 2013 Written by Tonya

I finally took the time to clean out my purse tonight and a lot of mysteries were revealed; like why it has been so damn heavy!! I was carrying around a rock for God’s sake!!

I also realized that without a doubt I am indeed the mother of a boy. See above.

I also have a bit of a lip gloss hoarding problem and a weakness for gummy candy.

Other surprises included two packages of Wet Ones, an over stuffed wallet, a bunch of trash, two pairs of glasses (one case was empty!), a magazine I swiped from a doctor’s office and will probably never find the time to read, a toy car, a pair little boy’s undies (more evidence of being a mom to a boy), 6 bangles and a pair of earrings from my last date night, an empty(!) water bottle, and a very lovely (yet unnecessary) thank you gift all the way from Canada. Thanks, Robin!

When was the last time you cleaned out your purse? Any interesting discoveries?

10 Things Totally Pissing Me Off This Week

Posted on May 17, 2013 Written by Tonya

Call it hormones, the wacky weather, lack of sleep or just first world problems, here are 10 things currently pissing me off:

1. Toilet paper in public restrooms. Not only is it cheap and flimsy, why can’t I get more than one teensy square? I hate fighting with those damn dispensers!

2. Pharmacies. I wonder how much time I’ve wasted at the pharmacy this week alone; dropping off prescriptions, picking up prescriptions, arguing with pharmacists over prescriptions, waiting for prescriptions, coming back to pick up prescriptions. It’s enough to drive a person absolutely bananas!!

3. Bad parking jobs. Does anyone know how to park anymore? Twice this week I have had to climb into my car through the passenger door to get into the driver’s seat. The lines on the lot are there for a reason!!

4. Sunburns. Yep, I’m an idiot and before you ask, I was wearing SPF 55, but I guess it wore off after 5 long hours in the sun. Ouch!! Luckily, it’s only in my belly.

5. Apartment living. Enough said.

Actually, there is an entire blog post in that one, but I’ll save it for another day….

6. Poop. Specifically, people that don’t/won’t/can’t pick up after their dogs. O_o

7. Visiting blogs that make me jump through hoops to leave a comment. Math equations, Captcha quote and a check box? Just to prove I’m human? Are we still doing this? C’mon, already.

8. The punishment light. You know the one, your neighborhood has to have one, it’s the traffic light that is red no matter what direction you’re coming from and you always get stuck at it. Always!!

9. Services that just can’t be services. Regular every day, need to go places like the car wash or hair salon that have treats and snacks and ice cream and TOYS!!! Can’t I just get my car washed without having to argue with my son and say no 900 times?!

10. Customer, no service. It doesn’t matter where I go anymore, I can get no help from sales staff and they actually act like I’m just a huge burden to them. I know minimum wage is low, but please do your job.

What’s irritating you these days?

Something’s Missing

Posted on June 13, 2012 Written by Tonya

Sometimes I feel as though I’ve misplaced my keys. I’ll empty out all the contents of my over-sized purse, crawl on the floor of my car and remove all the cushions from the couches only to discover them in the laundry room on shelf between the bleach and the OxiClean, right where I left them. How they got there I haven’t a clue.

Other times it’s like I forgot to purchase something on my list at the supermarket, the MAIN reason for my trip. I walk out clueless with three bags of stuff and get all the way home and chastise myself for missing the word MILK written in bold at the very top of the page. How does that happen?

Many times, it’s more of a sinking feeling, you know the kind when you could almost guarantee you left the iron or stove on, forgot to lock the front door or neglected to reach out to someone on their birthday?

It’s a nagging, uneasy, uncertain, something’s-just-not-right feeling.

It never subsides.

There is no escaping.

Sure, there are good days and bad days. Days without incident. Days when my keys are right where they should be, in the middle drawer of the bar in our kitchen. There are even days filled with so much joy my heart feels like it might burst right out of my chest and there is no way anything can bring me down. But, I am not naive, I know it’s only temporary because missing someone, or in my case two someones is a feeling I always possess. I carry it with me every day.

Anniversaries, birthdays and other special milestones and occasions are always the hardest. We just celebrated Lucas’ third birthday, Father’s Day is this weekend and my birthday is just around the corner. It’s summertime too and I have the fondest memories of my parents and family being together during the summer. I wish they were here.

Thoughts of my parents used to be the very first thing I thought of when I woke up in the morning and the last thing I thought about each night before closing my eyes, but now and I am so ashamed to admit this; several days will go by and they won’t even cross my mind. They are always in my heart, of course, but recalling them is growing more difficult and it is as though I’m reviewing my grocery list to make sure I have purchased everything I came for and I’m frantically checking and rechecking to make sure the door is locked. Ah yes, there it is, that persistent and familiar something’s missing feeling.

And I am acutely aware that it is.

Vacation Highlights

Posted on June 7, 2012 Written by Tonya

Trust me, I hate hearing about other people’s vacations just as much as the next gal, so I’ll just share the highlights from ours….

In case you missed it, we spent last week in North Carolina attending a wedding in Lake Lure and stayed at the inn where parts of Dirty Dancing was filmed.

Johnny's Cabin (and no, we did not stay here).

We were expecting it to be muggy and gross but instead it was mild and gorgeous, but as with all vacations there were ups and downs. I’ll let you decide which is which.

Four hotels in six days is a lot of work with luggage and a three year old.
I forgot to pack a hat, towels, beach toys, but was able to purchase all for $40.00. Grrr.
Those mountain ranges are beautiful, but the winding roads led to Lucas’ first experience with car sickness, which led to me washing out his soiled clothes and newly acquired towels in a public fountain. It was awesome. My husband took pictures.
None of us ever adjusted to the time difference so we didn’t make it to breakfast once (not even the free kind). Dry cereal in our hotel room does not count!
Speaking of eating, Lucas ate mac ‘n cheese for all but one meal. Can you say: super embarrassing and not always easy to accommodate?
I came home with two mysterious bug bites.
Reading the same three children’s books over and over and over again gets old really fast.
Over the course of three days, we were in a swimming pool, a lake and a splash pad.
One Lightening McQueen was thrown into a fish pond at the lovely Charlotte Airport Sheraton. Luckily, it was retrievable.
One of us (ME) missed the wedding ceremony because another one of us (LUCAS) was napping (see bullet point above about time difference adjustment).
~~Too much~~ BBQ, hush puppies and sweet tea were enjoyed.

One of the many reasons I adore traveling is meeting new people and learning something unexpected each day I’m away from home. I suppose I don’t have to travel to do that, but I seem to be more open to it when I’m living out of a suitcase. Here are those highlights:

An iPhone can be thrown 20 feet across a room (don’t ask, it was not one of my finest moments) and still work 24 hours later. Those 24 hours were touch-and-go and there was nothing but a black screen and a few tears on on my part, but it came back to me stronger than ever.

Brazil has the second largest population of Japanese people (next to Japan, of course) in the world. [wedding reception convo]

The most visited winery in the United States isn’t located in Napa Valley. It’s at Biltmore Estate, in the mountains of North Carolina, where approximately 1 million visitors stop by to sample award-winning estate wines each year. Grapes can be imported for processing and bottling to a place that has perfect climate or making wine.

A couple having a dinner at a table next to us made a point of coming over to our table to welcome us to North Carolina after overhearing us talk about our home. Southern hospitality truly exists.

Newborn puppies can die from something tragic called Fading Puppy Syndrome (again, don’t ask).

Once you get home from a vacation and look through all the photos you took, there won’t be a single shot of the entire family together.

There is no place like home!

Me completely geeking out on the audio tour at Biltmore Estate.

One of the best parts of our trip for me was of course being together as a family but I also thoroughly enjoyed (as exhibited in the photo above) visiting Biltmore House and Gardens in Asheville. Completed in 1895, George Vanderbilt’s 250-room chateau is as impressive today as it was more than a century ago. Biltmore House is truly an architectural and historical wonder.

Odd Ball

Posted on April 12, 2012 Written by Tonya

Last week Alison of Mama Wants This wrote a piece called Quirks, where she shared 10 strange and wonderful things she does and not only did I nod along (2. Toilet paper in my house is OVER the spool. Never under. Under bothers me. Tremendously.) but I laughed out loud (8. I don’t like uneven numbers. Like 7.), then I thought, I have some pretty strange quirks myself.

Don’t we all?

Here are 10 of my odd ball idiosyncrasies:

1. I don’t like coffee. Of any kind. In a Starbucks world, this gets a lot of strange reactions, trust me, especially when I order Chai tea lattes.

2. I organize the dollar bills in my wallet from smallest to largest with the Presidents always facing me.

3. I can’t get one hand wet without getting the other one wet too.

4. Towels in our bathrooms have to be lined up straight over the towel rack.

5. I love the beach, but despise sand.

6.Whining makes me want to mash my teeth in, especially if it’s my own son’s.

7. I don’t like to eat food with my hands. Not even pizza.

8. I an an over-stocker. I always have a Kleenex, toothpaste, toothbrushes, Q-tips and dish soap waiting in the wings; and we never run out of toilet paper or paper towels in my house.

9. One of the very first things I do in the morning (even before I pee) is make the bed. To me a made bed is the foundation for a good day.

10. I cannot start a book or movie without finishing it. There have two exceptions in the book category: The Hunger Games (I know, I know) and The Book Thief. Both are still on my book shelf and I WILL get to them. Someday…

Thanks, Alison for the idea and rest assured, you are not alone in your quirks.

Please feel free to share some of yours below! Us oddballs need to stick together.

Making Wishes

Posted on October 29, 2011 Written by Tonya

Star light, star bright
First star I see tonight
I wish I may, I wish I might
Have the wish I wish tonight.

Have you ever…

moved the clasp on your necklace around to the back of your neck?

found a four-leaf clover?

had a ladybug land on you?

thrown a coin into a fountain?

silently wished on a shooting stars?

blown out the candles on your birthday cake?

found a penny, picked it up and hoped to all day long have good luck?

closed your eyes, counted to three and pulled a part a wish bone?

blown an eye lash from your finger tip?

bought a special necklace made of string and waited patiently for the string to break?

hoped for the last pour from a wine bottle?

prayed to a higher power?

made deals with God?

meditated?

visualized a positive outcome?

Have you ever had a dream in your heart or wished for something special? Something big and wonderful.

Have you ever wanted something so much that you thought you might go crazy?

Sure you have, we all have.

But, did your wish come true?

How long did it take? The waiting is always the hardest part.

How many sleepless nights did you have to endure? How many tears did you shed? How long did you hold your breath, keep your fingers crossed, or on to your secret?

Wishes keep faith and hope alive, so as long as the clock strikes 11:11, I will continue wishing for my heart’s desire.

Of course, when I pause and take a look at my life, I realize my greatest wish may have already come true.

Brave

Posted on September 4, 2011 Written by Tonya

As my eyes ping pong from the two seals bobbing up and down 20 feet from shore to my left and Lucas and his dad standing at the water’s edge to my right, all I can think is: what makes these two creatures so brave?

The playful and curious mammals are enjoying riding the waves and being propelled closer and closer to the land, only to be pushed back out to sea again. They are visibly having fun and it’s a joy to witness.

My two year old is just as confident with every single step he takes further into the Pacific Ocean. The glee on his face makes me giggle as I shake my head. He adores the water but cannot swim, so I’m also a bit on edge.

The difference?

The seals instinctively know that they can turn towards the ocean and go “home”. They have other challenges there, but if a foreign object or human came too close, they know to retreat or attack.

Lucas is armed with his dad at his side gripping him back to safety as needed and a sturdy life jacket. He is too young and little to know how to really protect himself, especially from the strong current and rough waters. He is thrilled to have the seals as company.

For now, both pairs are safe from predators and having the time of their lives.

If You Had Told Me 10 Years Ago…

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