movies

Big Kid Stuff

Posted on August 27, 2015 Written by Tonya

It has been a milestone summer for Lucas. Not only did he turn six four days before he graduated from Kindergarten, I also gave him some pretty cool big kid liberties and tasks.

I introduced him to several of my favorite 80’s movies, including; Home Alone 1 and 2, Mary Poppins, The NeverEnding Story, Honey, I Shrunk The Kids, all three Indiana Jones movies and all three Stuart Littles. His favorite was the Indiana Jones series and was thrilled to go on the ride at Disneyland, even though he held his hands over his eyes the entire time.

First library card – July 9, 2015

This summer we also turned off the child lock on Lucas’s car door, he got his first library card, learned how to unlock our front door with a key, helping me out tremendously when I have my arms full and we are trying to get into the house and he attended his first concert! I always hoped his first concert would be Dave Matthews Band, but it was Taylor Swift and although she was amazing, we both felt like we were at the world’s largest slumber party for 13-year-old girls.

Taylor Swift concert – August 22, 2015

This summer, Lucas walked/ran 3+ miles with me more than once, was introduced to Pokemon cards and is now an avid collector and authority on the topic, loves watching Wheel of Fortune and is surprisingly good at solving the puzzles, he made two new friends and completed three activity workbooks (first grade math, reading and writing).

I also taught him how to make a phone call from my iPhone and an all important 911 call.

What a summer! My sweet boy grew leaps and bounds and he is definitely ready for first grade.

Incidentally, speaking of major milestones, today marks my sixth blogiversary! I can’t believe I have been doing this for six years. As always, I wish I had more time to devote to my writing. Thank you for being on this journey with me.

Click on image for source.

On Disappearing & A Review Of “The Age Of Adaline”

Posted on April 29, 2015 Written by Tonya

Nowadays with Netflix and Amazon instant video, movies going to DVD within months of their release on the big screen, RedBox rentals, On Demand, AppleTV and the 500 channels cable companies provide, there really is no reason to see a movie in the theater anymore.

But, in the theater is my favorite way to enjoy a movie.

Growing up, going to see a movie was a family pastime and with two small children, something I seldom do anymore. My husband hates going to the theater and it’s rare, but I can drag him to see something or if there is something I am dying to see, I’ll go alone.

And so today, I blew off cardio barre and a ton of errands and disappeared into the dark for just under two hours.

I took myself to see The Age of Adaline.

I loved every moment.

Both the disappearing and the film.

I knew I would.

One of my favorite books ever is The Time Traveler’s Wife by Audrey Niffenegger and I liked the movie too. Time travel is fascinating as is defying age and beating mortality.

Like with The Time Traveler’s Wife, The Age of Adaline asks the viewer to suspend all belief in things that cannot be explained scientifically and let the movie take you to an extraordinary place.

You have to believe that miracles can happen.

Adaline, played by the stunning Blake Lively does a remarkable job. Her voice and her mannerisms are flawless much like her appearance as Adaline Bowman.

After having been in a car accident, a series of unlikely events occur at the same time and Adaline ceases to age, forever remaining 25.

Adaline’s story is fluid and original and also very sad. Adaline is close to very few people and picks up her life every decade or so to move to a new town and assume a new identity. She lives this way for 60 years and then an encounter with someone she used to know forces her to come clean and let go.

The movie was also visually beautiful with San Francisco as the background and the gorgeous and elegant costumes made for perfect eye candy.

I know how difficult it is to get away, but if you need a wonderful escape, I highly recommend this lovely and thought provoking film. If you do happen to see, please let me know your thoughts.

For photo credit, click on image.

From IMDb: After miraculously remaining 29 years old for almost eight decades, Adaline Bowman has lived a solitary existence, never allowing herself to get close to anyone who might reveal her secret. But a chance encounter with charismatic philanthropist Ellis Jones reignites her passion for life and romance. When a weekend with his parents threatens to uncover the truth, Adaline makes a decision that will change her life forever.

The Great Debate [In My Head]

Posted on September 16, 2014 Written by Tonya

I hear Lola stir in her crib upstairs just as I’m half way through an article on the Today Parents Website. She’s cooing and talking joyfully at first and then her pleads became more urgent.

I know as I climb the stairs to her room I’ll never finish the article. I’ll never get back to any of the tabs open on my laptop. At least not today. I’m excited to see my baby as she has been napping for over an hour and we can now take our daily walk and play and look at books together but I’m also dismayed that the quiet me time I had been enjoying for the last 90 minutes is now over. I didn’t accomplish nearly as much as I had hoped. Damn it! Why didn’t I spend more time writing?!

One of the things I have tried to instill in Lucas is this mantra:

Chores before play, put away one game before setting up another, errands before park, etc.

I first heard it two years before I became a mother in the 2007 movie, The Great Debaters with Denzel Washington. I liked it then and love it now that I have children. I’ve also tried to follow it myself and it seems to work (most of the time) with my son.

My days are long and start the second my feet hit the floor. Full of tasks I have to do…

Make beds.

Make breakfasts, lunch, snacks, bottles.

Care for the dog.

Lay out clothes.

Change the baby.

Pick up stray socks, dirty bibs, Lego.

Assist Lucas as he packs his backpack.

Load the car.

It’s no different in your house.

Mornings are particularly and notoriously busy for households with children, trying to get everyone what they need to start the day.

A mom’s “have to do’s” last All. Day. Long. As soon as one need is met, it is followed up with another and another and another. And even our free time is not our own because when the kids are in school or napping is when the real work happens. I mean, who can sweep the floor with an adorable seven-month-old scooting around or an anxious Kindergartener ready to play another round of UNO? I certainly can’t.

So, alas… the things I want to do fall by the wayside. I make sure to exercise five days a week because if I don’t, I start to get twitchy. But apart from that, all I want to do lately is write. Writing is tricky, I can’t just sit down at my desk and write, I have to first peruse the Internet, respond to an e-mail, pay a bill, place a Diapers.com order, take a Buzz Feed quiz, get lost in the vortex that is Facebook.

I must tell myself every morning: After the kids are in bed and dinner is cleaned up and put away, I’ll stay up late and write.

And every night I crash within minutes of my children or I fall into bed too exhausted to do anything but exchange a few words with my husband and watch another episode of Chopped while I play Words With Friends.

Sigh! It’s the great debate in my head these days… when to write. Not what to write, just when?!?!

I was on a roll the other day and considered giving Lola a piece of paper to keep her occupied for a few minutes. And then I thought better and got down on the floor with her and worked on spit bubbles and mouth noises. It was time better spent, but my head is on overdrive and I must find some hours in the day to devote to writing.

Do you struggle with this too? When do you find the time to do the things you’re passionate about?

Live & In Person

Posted on April 3, 2014 Written by Tonya

Several times I have shared how much I love music, from my current workout playlist, to favorite songs and my adoration of Dave Matthews.

I have a short list of songs that I *must* hear performed live before I die because they are some of my all time favorites, meaningful to me and have helped me find my voice when my own words have failed me or I simply admire the artist so much that I have to see them in concert. In alphabetical order, they are:

#41 by The Dave Matthews Band*
A Thousand Years by Christina Perri*
Anna Begins by The Counting Crows*
Clarity by John Mayer*
Good Enough by Sarah McLachlan
Nick of Time by Bonnie Raitt*
Piano Man by Billy Joel*
Pictures of You by The Cure
Second Hand News by Fleetwood Mac*
Someone Like You by Van Morrison

I’ve been lucky enough to see the starred ones, some more than once!

Last night I saw Christina Perri at a small radio marketing event that my sister’s company was involved in at the Hard Rock Cafe in Hollywood. Perri sang only three songs, two from her new album, released this week and opened with “A Thousand Years”.

I cried through the entire song. I didn’t sing along even though I know every word, I just cried.

I loved the Twilight series, read the books and was first in line to see the movies (all five), but I don’t remember hearing Perri’s song during the credits of The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn—Part 1. Apparently after fans heard it on the movie’s soundtrack, they adopted it as “Bella and Edward’s song”. It’s significance to me isn’t Twihard related; for me it served as an anthem during my struggles with infertility, a love song to a child I longed to meet someday.

I’m still recovering/processing/coming up for air from that chapter of my life and it’s proving to be harder than I thought. Infertility is a crazy roller coaster ride of ebbs and flows, hope and disappointment and there were some very dark days when I didn’t think I could handle it anymore and those were the days I turned to my infertility playlist for inspiration, a good cry and above all comfort. “A Thousand Years” is on that playlist and will always be a favorite and gentle reminder of a very difficult period of my life.

Last night was only the second time I have heard the song since my miracle, Lola was born and I was completely overcome with emotion. It’s a beautiful and moving song.

I have died everyday waiting for you
Darling don’t be afraid I have loved you
For a thousand years
I love you for a thousand more

And all along I believed I would find you
Time has brought your heart to me
I have loved you for a thousand years
I’ll love you for a thousand more

Not only did I get the chance to hear Christina Perri live, I also met her after her set and told her how much her song means to me. She was gracious and kind and asked how everything turned out and thanked me for sharing my story.

It was a very special experience. Thank you, again, Leah! You better believe I rushed home to snuggle our little Lola.

Meeting Christina Perri – Hard Rock Cafe, April 2, 2014

Old School Blogging: The Holiday Edition

Posted on December 18, 2013 Written by Tonya

Today I am linking up with Elaine of The Miss Elaine-ous Life and Kir of The Kir Corner for this month’s Old School Blogging: The Holiday Edition! If you’re not familiar with Old School Blogging, it’s where bloggers revive blogging memes that went around years ago.

Do you Celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah, or both?

Ho Ho Ho!! Does this answer the question? (:

Peppermint or Chocolate?

Chocolate. Always chocolate.

Sing us into the Holiday Season. What is your favorite carol this time of year?

I have a play list of over nine hours of holiday music! For me it’s not Christmastime until I hear Wham’s Last Christmas or Paul McCartney’s Wonderful Christmastime, but I adore the lyrics to Grown Up Christmas List:

No more lives torn apart
That wars would never start
And time would heal all hearts
And everyone would have a friend,
Right would always win,
Love would never end.
This is my grown up Christmas list

– David Foster (music), Linda Thompson-Jenner and Amy Grant (lyrics)

Tell us about a favorite family or personal holiday tradition.

One of my favorite family holiday traditions on Christmas Day was after all the presents were opened and prominently displayed in front of the tree (another tradition), we would go to a movie. Many big blockbusters open on Christmas Day and we always had fun trying to agree on which one to see. After the movie we would come home and make leftover turkey sandwiches and each have a slice (or two) of pie. Chocolate pudding for me, pumpkin for my dad, and pecan for my mom and sister. It’s hard to believe that this will be my sixth Christmas without my parents, but my sister and I have kept up this tradition.

Come on, you remember your favorite Christmas gift. Tell us all about it.

In November 2007, a month after my parents died, my husband, sister and I traveled to Tunisia to visit the school, ACST (American Cooperative School of Tunis), where they worked. We wanted to spend time where they last had, visit with their colleagues and gain some peace and understanding. It was also important to me to be the ones that cleared out their home.

It was a difficult trip to say the least, but necessary for our grieving process. We were met with much understanding and support and much of the time we were not only being consoled but were consoling.

In a very touching ceremony, the school planted two olive trees in a common area on campus and dedicated one to each of my parents while we were in town.

That year for Christmas my husband had an olive tree planted for me in our side yard.

I love this tree and will always appreciate the kind gesture that my husband made in finding and having it planted at our home. It will forever remind me of our trip to Tunis, the two trees that grow and bloom there in memory of my parents and of course, my parents themselves.

This poor tree has been uprooted and been living in a box for almost two years. This week it was planted in the front yard at our new house where it will hopefully grow and flourish.

December 16, 2013

That magical moment: your favorite scene from a holiday movie.

It’s A Wonderful Life is my favorite holiday movie and I love when Clarence tells George: “You see George, you really had a wonderful life.” Ah… gets me every time.

Kissing under the mistletoe. Who do you hope is standing underneath (we know it’s normally your spouse, but if it did not have to be, who would you choose)?

Ryan Gosling.

Duh.

Swans a swimming, lords a leaping, golden rings: which gift of the 12 days of Christmas would you like most?

None! Unless those maids do more than milking.

Play Secret Santa. What inappropriate gift would you love to give this year?

Hmmm… I’m going to have to give this some thought but Ryan Gosling and a big red bow come to mind. Just off the top pf my head.

Martha Stewart or the Grinch? What is your decorating style?

I wish I could say Martha Stewart, but I really fall somewhere in between. Someday I want to splurge and have lights professionally installed on the front of our house. I looked into it this year, but was shocked at how utterly ridiculously expensive it is. I like to get our tree up early and I have a motley crew of Christmas guys (stuffed animals) displayed around the house and holiday towels for the guest bathroom. I am grateful that we haven’t started the Elf on the Shelf madness yet!

What is ONE WORD that defines the holiday season for you?

Believe!

If Santa could assure its delivery, what’s the first thing on your holiday wish LIST?

The safe delivery of a healthy baby girl, born anytime after January 1, 2014!

If you want to play along or read other Old School Blogging: Holiday Edition lists, visit The Miss Elaine-ous Life or The Kir Corner and then compile your own! Don’t forget to tweet it out using the hashtag #OSBlog. Happy Christmas, everyone!

My First Crush

Posted on August 7, 2013 Written by Tonya

His name is Scott Brewer and until recently (like just before I hit Publish on this post) we were Facebook friends. For the record, I never reached out to him in any way, never liked one of his photos or commented on any of his status updates. He didn’t either. I don’t even remember who friended whom.

I also don’t know why I liked him, I certainly never spoke a word to him, but he was oh so dreamy, very all-American looking; tan, blond hair, that would turn green in the summertime from hours spent in the pool, piercing blue eyes and he was never without a baseball cap, which teachers were constantly hounding him to remove.

My best friend at the time, Michelle also had a crush on Scott Brewer. He was never just Scott. Always Scott Brewer.

We were only classmates for two years, if that. Second and third grade.

It wasn’t until five years later when one of my all-time favorite movies came out that I truly understood what a crush was. In the wise words of Jim Baker: “That’s why they call them crushes. If they were easy, they’d call ’em something else.” (Sixteen Candles, 1984).

SIDE NOTE: From his blurry Facebook profile pic, Scott Brewer did not retain his good looks and I find a little satisfaction in that.

There were many, many crushes to follow: Frederic, Tariq, Lorin, Robert, Steven and those were all before I hit high school and my raging hormones really kicked in and I discovered Tiger Beat magazine.

This post was written for Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop Prompt #5: First crush.

24 Envelopes

Posted on February 27, 2012 Written by Tonya

Watching movies has always been my way to relax and I try to see all the latest ones, usually over the course of a few nights because I can’t stay awake from start to finish, so I adore red carpet events.

I love the Golden Globes, Emmys, Grammys, SAG Awards and the coup de grace…the Oscars, my favorite of all the awards shows!

I have always been the girl captivated in front of the TV, ballot in hand, watching the arrivals to see what everyone is wearing, who’s with whom, the extravagant and eye popping jewels, the hair, the makeup, all of it!

Whether it’s rude and ridiculous (Bridesmaids), dark humor amidst family drama (The Descendents), or the utterly sublime (The Artist), Oscar night is a celebration of cinema and all the reasons we love Hollywood…

To read more on my Oscar take, please visit my post today, 24 Envelopes on Smart Mom Style.

February 9, 2002

Posted on February 8, 2012 Written by Tonya

Ten years ago on this day, it was a Saturday and my now ex-husband’s sister’s two sons, our nephews, ages four and six were spending the night with us for the first and last time.

All night.

I hadn’t spent that much time with children since I moved out of my parents house (my own sister is almost 12 years younger than me). I was equal parts excited and nervous.

With their mother’s approval, I took them to see the movie The Lord of the Rings.

A three hour movie!

What was I thinking?

They were both up for it, so I thought what the hell. What did I know?

About 30 minutes into the film, the elder of the two started and kept carrying on about whatever latest video game device my ex had and wanted to go back to our house to play with it. I gave in, got my money back and we headed home.

My ex was probably on the back 9 and ~~didn’t want to be~~ couldn’t be reached and I had no clue how to work the video game. There was whining and I’m sure tears, but like I do now with Lucas, I distracted them with what I can’t recall and before long they (sort of) forgot all about blowing stuff up while zoning out in front of the TV.

The next morning came too soon, not only because I was enjoying playing house, but I remember thinking I hope all children don’t wake up this damn early. Ha!

I remember I made pancakes because that’s what families did on Sunday mornings and I vividly recall envisioning myself being a mother someday as I gave each of the boys a turn mixing the batter.

Three months later, my marriage unraveled and I wouldn’t become a mother for another seven years.

Fast forward ten years and I still miss those two boys, who now have a younger brother and think of them often. I wish that there could have been some way that I could have remained in their life, remained their aunt.

This post was written for Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop Prompt 2.) Start with the phrase: “Ten years ago on this day, I was…” (inspired by Business 2 Blogger)

We Remembered

Posted on October 18, 2011 Written by Tonya

We remembered.

We avoided eye contact at first.

We got dressed and put on make-up.

We went to brunch and toasted with champagne.

We enjoyed a little retail therapy and indulged in sweet treats. Both helped for a little while.

We received dozens of beautiful flowers and at least a 100 of other tokens of love and well wishes throughout the day in the form of phone calls, text messages, Facebook and Twitter posts. Each one helped immensely.

We listened to their favorite music and smiled.

We talked about the year ahead and what they would be missing.

We drew animals and painted shapes with Lucas and giggled.

We sat around the dining room table and devoured the comfort food my husband prepared. There were more toasts.

We looked through the sympathy cards we were sent four years ago. Many I had not read before. All of them heartfelt.

We went to a movie and sat side by side in the dark and laughed in all the same places.

We hugged.

We cried.

We remembered.

Another anniversary come and gone.

My Legs Are Still Hairy, But…

Posted on April 24, 2011 Written by Tonya

My toddler-free weekend was equal parts relaxing and busy.

I didn’t make it to a yoga class, finish reading that book, spend time on my computer or shave my legs, but I did watch four movies (one in the theater!), tackled a pile of magazines while walking 10 miles on the treadmill, had fun girl’s night out, enjoyed a long lunch with my besties and their adorable babies (which only made me miss Lucas cuddles) and I ventured into the kitchen and made lasagna roll-ups for our Easter dinner.

I missed my boys, but I relished my time alone.

Todd said Lucas was perfect (of course he was) all weekend, so here’s hoping another Daddy/Lucas trip is in my future. In the meantime, seeing as Daddies deserve time off too, I planned a weekend trip for Lucas and I to visit his grandparents next month.

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