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The Soundtrack Of My Life

Posted on June 10, 2010 Written by Tonya

I love music and it has always been a huge part of my life. I believe everything is better with music. I have over 6000 songs on my iPod and an “Essential” playlist with over 100 of my “favorites”. They are from all different genres, some are fast, some are slow, some have no lyrics at all, they make me want to dance or cry, several remind me of simpler times when I was young and carefree, but all have special meaning to me of a particular time and place in my life and without a doubt every one makes me smile.

When Lucas was almost five months old he accompanied me on a road trip to Arizona and I played the entire playlist for him and shared the significance of each song. He slept though most of it, but I didn’t take it personally. Since then he has heard those songs and many others over and over. I hope he grows up to enjoy music as much as I do.

When I think about The Soundtrack Of My Life, I think about losing my virginity to Prince’s Sign ‘O’ The Times and dancing my first slow dance to Drive by The Cars and the fact that Fade Into You by Mazzy Star was playing when I got into my first car accident, and anytime I hear anything by The Grateful Dead, I will remember my first true love and Morning Dance by Spyro Gyro will always make me miss my dad.

But, there are 10 tunes that I’ll never grow tired of and also represent my life in very big was (in order of their release dates):

1. Different Drum (1970) by Linda Ronstadt And The Stone Poneys

Yes, and I ain’t saying you ain’t pretty
All I’m saying is I’m not ready
For any person place or thing
To try and pull the reins in on me

I have always loved this song and it’s carefree, Miss Independent, you can’t tie me down message. I chose it for three reasons:
1) Ronstadt and I share our beginnings in Tucson, AZ.
2) While attending the University of Arizona I worked at Pier One Imports and actually helped Ms. Ronstadt when she came into the store one day.
3) My mother’s love of folk music – she couldn’t carry a tune to save her life, but I sang along to The Mamas and the Papas, The Carpenters and Carol King growing up.

2. Pictures of You (1989) by The Cure

If only I’d thought of the right words
I could have held on to your heart
If only I’d thought of the right words
I wouldn’t be breaking apart
All my pictures of you

I love 80’s music…Duran Duran, Madonna, Michael Jackson, Culture Club, New Order and of course, The Cure. Gorgeous and haunting lyrics, enough said!

3. How You’ve Grown (1992) by 10,000 Maniacs

“My, how you’ve grown.”
I remember that phrase from my childhood days too.
“Just wait and see.”
I remember those words and how they chided me,
when patient was the hardest thing to be.
Because we can’t make up for the time that we’ve
lost, I must let these memories provide.
No little girl can stop her world to wait for me.

This song always remind me of the almost 12 years between my younger sister and I. I feel as though my parents and I always tried to make her older than she was and then we’d end up getting frustrated with her for being what she was…younger.

4. Waiting in Vain (1995) by Annie Lennox

It’s been three years since I’m knocking on your door
And I still can knock some more
Ooh, boy, ooh, boy, is it crazy? Look, I wanna know now
For I to knock some more

I love the Bob Marley version of this song too, but this one stands out to me more because it’s sung by the incredible Annie Lennox; it just doesn’t get any better!

5. We Danced Anyway (1996) by Deana Carter

Well they say you can’t go back
But baby I don’t believe that
Come along with me, come on and dance with me

I love how country songs tell a story, but this song is just sweet and fun.

6. The Space Between (2001) by The Dave Matthews Band

These fickle fuddled words confuse me
Like will it rain today
We waste the hours with talking, talking
These twisted games we’re playing

We’re strange allies
With warring hearts
What a wild eyed beast you be

The space between
The wicked lies we tell and hope to keep safe from the pain

Anyone who knows me (Natalie!) knows I am CRAZY about Dave Matthews and it is very hard to just pick one song from their discography because I honestly love all of them. This song got a lot of airplay, but for me it’s the unmistakable tongue twisting lyrics and message of hope that keep me coming back for more.

7. Break Me (2001) by Jewel

Feels like being underwater
Now that I’ve let go
And lost control
Water kisses fill my mouth
Water fills my soul

This song stops me in my tracks every time I hear it. I love how vulnerable, fragile and downright raw the lyrics are. It reminds me of me in the beginning of any relationship I have ever had. It takes a lot of guts to put your true self out there, but it has been worth it every time.

8. Someone Like You (2001) Van Morrison

I’ve been all around the world
Marching to the beat of a different
Drum.
But just lately I have
Realized
The best is yet to come

I helped my dad search high and low for this song because he loved it and we finally found it on the soundtrack of the same title. Cheesy movie but a classic song.

9. Starry-Eyed Surprise (2002) by Paul Oakenfold featuring Crazy Town

Once again I found myself with my friends
Dancin’ the night away it’s like the party never ends
Then again we don’t want it to stop cause
Tonight’s the night it goes sweat box, laser beams, flashin’ lights

This is my “power song” for whenever I need that extra boost to go a little bit further on the treadmill. It never fails!

10. The Book of Love (2004) by Peter Gabriel

The book of love is long and boring
And written very long ago
It’s full of flowers and heart-shaped boxes
And things we’re all too young to know

Simple melody and witty lyrics; Peter Gabriel sings with a frailty and poignancy no one else could manage. Beautiful song!

And for good measure:

11. Far Away (2005) by Nickelback

‘Cause I needed, I need to hear you say that I love you (That I love you)
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you (And I forgive you) for being away for far too long

This song occupies a very special place in my heart and I can’t get through it without crying, especially when I hear the line below. It makes me think of my parents who have been gone for far too long and are very much missed every single day.

This was an incredible writing experience and I enjoyed walking down memory lane and really thinking about why I chose each and every one of the songs above. Thank you, Mama Kat for the topic. Incidentally, I made a play list of just these songs and listened to it while I wrote this, reaffirming my selections.

The best is yet to be.

I wrote this post for Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop – Prompt #1: Soundtrack of your life – Pick 10 songs that you would have on a soundtrack for your life, pick a line from each that you most identify with and write a short statement of why this song made it.

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The High Five

Posted on March 30, 2010 Written by Tonya

From time to time, I’d like to share my High Five, a list of five products that I am loving right now and why.

DISCLAIMER: The High Five will sort of be a random list, but will contain five things that make my life as a mom a little easier, funner, brighter and happier. The High Five may or may not be baby related. Enjoy!

1. Yogurt Covered Pretzels
I felt like I had been living under a rock until I tried my first yogurt covered pretzel. In a word: delicious! I will never forget my first one; Fourth of July weekend just weeks after you were born. OMG! Greatest combination of sweet and salty ever.

2. Flip Video Camcorder
The easiest thing in the world to use and a perfect way to share special, funny and cute Lucas moments with family and friends near and far. I haven’t even begun to use this device to it’s fullest potential.

3. Cetaphil
According to the Web site: The #1 dermatologist and pediatrician recommended brand of skin cleansers and moisturizers specially formulated to provide effective, gentle skin care to help your skin look and feel its best.

All true and super inexpensive to boot!

I am forever on the quest to find face products that are light weight, nondrying, chocked with SPF and don’t smell like perfume. Cetaphil is it! In the two months that I have been using the facial cleanser, moisturizer with 50 SPF (the highest SPF of any facial moisturizer!!) and night cream, I noticed a change in my skin tone and texture. L-O-V-E these products!!

4. Sugar Free Red Bull
This fantastic pick-me-up has actually been banned in some countries because of health risks, including heart attack or stroke according to Australian medical researchers, but on nights when I want/need to stay up past 9:00, it is a must.

5. Fisher Price’s Laugh & Learn Learning Home
I have learned that nothing brings you more delight than sitting in vintage cars, being on the swings at the park, crawling and this fun toy in the waiting room at Cranial Technologies.

Your Mommy & Me friend, Brenna has one too and you spent almost the entire two hours we were at her house recently playing with it. I’m thinking we might have to get you your very own…

The best is yet to be.

Day 35/100

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2010

Posted on January 2, 2010 Written by Tonya

2010?! Boy, does that sound weird. I love a new year and I am really looking forward to starting a whole new decade.

I do have a short list of some of my new year’s resolutions. I rarely enter into a new year without them and they are different each year. What can I say, I’m a realist; if I can’t or don’t do it, I remove it from the list! I am usually successful though. 🙂 This year, I vow to:

Start reading again, at least one hour a day. Oh, how I miss it!
Work out with a trainer twice a week and walk on my own four to five days a week on the quest to get my biscuit back in shape. I am off to a great start on this one; having already walked nine miles in 2010 so far.
Start working on baby #2 (scary thought!).
Walk across the Golden Gate Bridge, preferably with you in the BOB.
Use a cloth bag every. single. time. I go to the grocery store. Incidentally, this was my gift to all of my girlfriends this Christmas.
Organize our photos into album, boxes, frames, zip lock bags–something, anything just as long as they aren’t in piles.
Learn to live without so many magazines in my life. So far, I have already let five of my 10 subscriptions go. Yay for me! I should be reading books anyway.
Spend more time in the kitchen cooking (AKA learn to cook). I have collected yummy sounding recipes for years and it is time to try them out.

I am also really looking forward to my sister moving to Los Angeles (today!), selling our parents house (fingers crossed), our trip to Australia and New Caledonia in April and continuing to watch you grow and flourish.

I wish you and yours a wonderful new year filled with much love, laughter, prosperity and vibrant health.

The best is most certainly yet to be.

2009: A Year To Remember

Posted on December 20, 2009 Written by Tonya

With less than two weeks in 2009, I am reflecting on the past 12 months and I know without a doubt that this year will always be a very special year for me because it was the year you were born, but there were other personal highlights for me too:

January – I got an SUV, my first step on the road to mommyville.
February – A glorious and life changing week at Canyon Ranch.
March – A dreaded, but necessary trip to my father’s hometown of Shamrock, TX, which reconnected me to family.
March – The difficult and heartbreaking task of emptying my parents house and having an estate sale.
April – A very fun long Easter weekend spent dog sitting Winston, who I completely fell in love with and still miss.
March – May – A slew of first time parenting classes, seminars and lectures that in no way prepared me for the “real” thing.
April – Two lovingly hosted baby showers.
June – Your birth.
June – December – Getting to know my mother-in-law better.
July – Seeing Coldplay in concert (this was also the night of your first babysitter).
July – Trapeze school for my friend, Wendi’s 40th birthday.
September – Seeing Dave Matthews Band in concert (no yearly list of highlights would be complete without this). 🙂
February and September – Having two good friends give birth to their own little bundles of joy.
October – A short but very sweet visit from my aunt and uncle.
October – Seeing “The Lion King” on stage.
November – Our first family trip to Florence, Italy.
December – A 24 hour overnight date at the Hard Rock Hotel with your dad.

On a global scale, from a boy not in a balloon, to the inauguration of the nation’s 44th president, 2009 saw big and not so big stories dominate airwaves and front pages.

Here are just a few that I will remember (with help from The Huffington Post):

Miracle on the Hudson – January 15
Pilot makes emergency “splashdown” landing in Hudson River after aircraft suffers a “double bird strike.” All passengers and crew members survive. Pilot C.B. “Sully” Sullenberger becomes a hero.

Obama Sworn In – January 20
Barack Obama becomes the nation’s 44th president.

Madoff’s Multi-Billion Dollar Ponzi Scheme – March
Disgraced financier Bernard Madoff is sentenced to 150 years in prison for defrauding private investors and charities of billions over the course of his career. Many lose their life savings.

Michael Jackson’s Death – June 25
The death of the self-proclaimed King of Pop stands out in a summer of notable deaths. Jackson’s passing at age 50 was is as dramatic and theatrical as the performer’s life and includes accusations of murder at the hands of a private physician. Los Angeles prosecutors say any charges relating to Jackson’s death will come in 2010.

Sotomayor Becomes Supreme Court Justice – August 6
Justice Sonia Sotomayor becomes the nation’s first Hispanic person to serve on the U.S. Supreme Court. The former appeals court judge is Obama’s first nomination to the court and is confirmed despite efforts to block her nomination over comments she made about race in the courtroom. Sotomayor is the third woman to serve on the bench of the country’s highest court.

Sen. Ted Kennedy Dies – August 25
Longtime Senator from Massachusetts dies after battling brain cancer.

Jaycee Dugard Kidnapping – August 26
Jaycee Dugard is discovered alive after being kidnapped 18 years ago.

Balloon Boy – October 15
Falcon Heene makes headlines when his parents report that a helium-filled balloon floated away with the boy inside. The boy is later found safe in his family’s attic, but the ensuing media frenzy exposes cracks in the family’s story and Heene’s parents, reality TV wannabes, are charged with making false statements.

Fort Hood Shooting – November 5
13 die in an attack at Fort Hood in Texas, when Army psychiatrist Maj. Nidal Hasan allegedly opens fire.

Health Care Reform – November 7
A plan to reform America’s health care system moves forward in congress.

Gay Marriage Gains And Losses
Same-sex marriage gains approval in Iowa, Vermont, New Hampshire, and Washington D.C. It is rejected by voters in Maine and by the New York legislature.

U.S. Economy
High unemployment, slow economic growth, and high foreclosure rates persist despite stimulus package and bank bailouts.

Detroit Bailout
US automakers GM and Chrysler are bailed out by federal government.

Swine Flu, Vaccination Shortages
Swine Flu outbreak in Mexico becomes global pandemic. H1N1 vaccination production, delivery in US falls short of expectations.

Afghan War & Afghan Elections
Hamid Karzai is sworn in for second term as president after election opponent withdraws from runoff. President Obama deliberates over troop levels in Afghanistan and decides to escalate war with surge of 30,000 more American troops.

Iraq Draw-Down
Conditions improve but bombings persist as US forces prepare to end combat operations by August of 2010 and withdraw completely by 2012.

The best is yet to be and here’s looking forward to all that lies ahead in 2010.

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Half A Year

Posted on December 6, 2009 Written by Tonya

Once you outgrew your newborn diapers, I placed one of them on the memo board in your room as a gentle reminder that you once fit into it. Every time I look at that diaper, I am reminded of how quickly you are growing and changing. You are in size 3 diapers now! It’s crazy, where did the last six months go?

Today, we have made it through half a year and like you, I have SO much to learn! I think we are doing are okay though. Here are some of your milestones since turning five months old:

You can bounce yourself in your bouncy seat and sometimes it is the only thing that can calm you.
You LOVE the Johnny Jumper; I just wish we had a door frame in our home for one, but I guess that’s what Grandma & Grandpa’s house is for. 🙂
You get upset when something is taken away from you.
You are starting to love the “if I drop it, mom will pick it up” game.
You can roll over and back.
You can move an object from one hand to the other.
You can “hold” a conversation, in fact your communication skills in general have vastly improved and you can now squeal, scream (not my favorite), make bubbling sounds, and operatic octave changes. I can’t wait to hear “mama” and “dada“.
You are learning to love cereal and I’m learning to love feeding you with a spoon.
You are an international man of mystery having received your first passport stamp and celebrated your first Thanksgiving in Italy!
You can now use the Maclaren stroller (despite the recent recall) because you can sit up…with support.
You can not be trusted in any of the numerous apparatuses that we have for you without being securely strapped in because you have become a wiggle worm.
You have outgrown your first car seat but sadly are still rear-facing in your new one, a very fancy, plush Recaro.
You are almost exclusively in 6-9 month clothes now.
Your eyes are still blue.

The best is yet to be.

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Five Months Old

Posted on November 6, 2009 Written by Tonya

Today you are five months old, which also translates to 152 days or roughly 3680 hours. We have been keeping track. Since just seconds after you were born, your dad started the stop watch feature on his iPhone and it has been counting the minutes of your life ever since.

You are growing and changing every day and starting to become your own person. Here are some of this month’s highlights:

You can almost roll over and sit up on your own.
Your first two teeth are visible…pizza, here we come!
You definitely recognize your bottle, can hold it by yourself and it won’t be long before you are strong enough to feed yourself with it.
You still hate the car seat, or anything that restrains you.
You “talk” and “sing” to us all the time and one could swear you are trying to hold a conversation with us.
You are able to play on your own for several minutes at a time.
You have slept through the entire night just one time, but waking up just once…or twice.
You visited your first state (Arizona) by going on your first round trip road trip to get there and you were a trouper, but I felt very guilty for putting you through that.
You are a great yoga partner at our weekly Mommy & Me yoga class.
You are still super in loud restaurants and with new people, in fact you seem to love chaos and noise, but also really appreciate our one-on-one quiet time together.
You had your first sleep over at your friend Jackson’s house (whose mommy is a good friend of mine, so I was there too).
Your hair has started to grow back and it’s either brown or blond depending on how the sun hits it.
You love to play with your feet, although I think you are only aware of your right one so far. 🙂
You are finally enjoying playing in your exersaucer (in small doses).
At least once a week, you accompany your dad to Pannikin Coffee & Tea so I can sleep in. It is your special time together.
You have met three of your great aunts and one great uncle.
Since you born, I have pushed you almost 240 miles in your BOB stroller on our daily walks.
You celebrated your first Halloween as an adorable little monkey.
Your eyes are still blue. 🙂

You have changed my entire world and I fall more in love with you every day. I can’t wait to see what the next month has in store for us.

The best is yet to be.

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