Letters For Lucas

Wonders, Mishaps, Blunders and Joy.. commentary on my life as a mom in the form of letters to my son

Santa Ana Zoo

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Today, Lucas and I met my friend Colleen and her son, Jackson at the Santa Ana Zoo, also known as, the home of 50 Monkeys! Lucky for us, monkeys are one of our favorite animals.

We also love elephants and had the pleasure of taking a ride on Miss Becky.
Wouldn’t you know it, the zoo also has a train ride called Zoofari Express for the “choo choo” lover in all of us and a classical carrousel ride made up of endangered animals. Lucas rode the cheetah. Here he is giving the big cat a pat. With temperatures in the low 80’s, it was a hot day but a lot of fun too!

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Never Fade Away

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I ask you right here please to agree with me that a scar is never ugly. That is what the scar makers want us to think. But you and I, we must make an agreement to defy them. We must see all scars as beauty. Okay? This will be our secret. Because take it from me, a scar does not form on the dying. A scar means, I survived. – Little Bee by Chris Cleave

Everyone loves a good scar story.
We all have at least one.
I have six.
Little reminders that have faded over time of my vanity, immaturity and close calls…
In order in which they were received:
1. Inside left leg – I had a benign tumor removed when I was four years old and had to wear a full leg cast for eight weeks. The scar is roughly six inches long and I have only ever been comfortable with my husband touching it.
2. Left hand – an inch long scar from hitting a mirror in an elevator of our apartment complex upon having an argument with my father. I NEVER thought the mirror would shatter into a million pieces. Nice reminder of my teenage angst, huh? The really sad part is I don’t even remember what the fight was about.
3. Right leg, just below my knee – a mess of a scar that thankfully only shows up when I tan from a motorbike accident that I was in on my birthday in 1985 with my dear friend Sophie. I was the passenger and alcohol was involved.
4. Center of my forehead – a quarter inch horizontal scar from a pea-sized calcium deposit I had removed.
5. Right heel – a three incher from a “pump bump” (heel spur) I had removed in college. What woman doesn’t want to wear heels from time to time?
6. Right breast – a half inch long reminder that a lump I found could have been a lot worse.
I have other scars too, the ones that were self inflicted; ear ring holes (at one point I had four, now only two remain) and three very meaningful tattoos that I don’t regret getting even for one second.
And then there are the scars you can’t see, the ones on my heart made by the losses in my life. The ones full of memories and love and that will never fade away.
This post is for Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop: Prompt 1.) Scarred.

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Perfect Balance

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New Year’s Eve used to mean buying tickets to the hottest party, scoring an invitation, going all out to have one of our own, or having a nice, long romantic dinner for two followed by drinking like a fish.

This year, we had an 18 month old and had no babysitter, so our New Year’s eve was quiet and spent at a nearby Mexican restaurant. We were home by 7:00.

The salsa and margaritas were free flowing, but one hour is about Lucas’ threshold for dining out.

I was able to capture these cute photos of him with a balloon using my new favorite iPhone app, Mobile Photobooth. However…

If the first week of the 2011, is any indication to what the rest of the year has in store for me and my little family, I’m thrilled!

So far, Lucas and I have been to Pretend City Children’s Musem, explored a new park, went to a friend’s house for a fun play date and have made several successful trips to Target together in an effort to stock and organize our new home.

I’ve worked out four times, had lunch with a friend, a date night with Todd, have seen four awesome movies (The American, Inception, Rabbit Hole and The Town), one was even in the theater and spent a glorious hour in a spa chair!

It’s been the perfect balance of family time, friend time, me time and exploring our new surroundings. What more could I ask for?

This post is for Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop: Prompt 2.) If the way you spent your New Year’s Eve is any indication of how the rest of the year will go, how would you say your future is looking right about now?

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Vegas On My Mind

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An amusement park for adults.
Beautiful bodies in barely there bikinis.
Casinos full of eager players trying to keep their cool and their cash.
Dressed to the nines, dancing until the stilettos must come off and the sun comes up.
Entertainment everywhere you turn.
Fearless, foolish, fun.
Great friends getting together for a girl’s trip!
Hot spots, high energy and hangovers.
Inhibitions revealed.
Jackpot. Jokers wild. Seven come 11. Bet. Push. Stay.
Knowing you are going to hurt in the morning.
Lights, loud music, “LOVE”.
Mandalay Bay, Monte Carlo, MGM, Mirage.
Never. Coming. Again. Is what we always tell yourself, yet…
Once you’re there, one night is never quite long enough.
Poolside cocktails in the hot summer sun.
Quick escape, dangerously only an hour away.
Risk. Roll of the dice. Reward.
Smoke-filled rooms full of sparkle, shimmer and shine.
Time stands still and taunts you to stay up later.
Under dressed, over exposed and within reach.
VIP all the way.
Winner winner, chicken dinner!
X-rated, overrated, under estimated, it’s Vegas, baby!
Yearning for a shower. And a nap.
Zzzzz.

This post is for The Red Dress Club’s writing meme, Red Writing Hood. This weeks prompt is: write a short piece – fiction, non-fiction, poetry, whatevs – in which each sentence starts with the next letter of the alphabet. Starting with “A.” So, yes, your finished product will consist of 26 sentences.

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A New Year

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2010 was a year of highs and lows for our household. Luckily the highs outweighed the lows and in many cases I shared them on Letters For Lucas

Here are (just) the highlights:
January – Leah moved to Los Angeles.
March – I got my third tattoo.
April/May – We took a very memorable trip to Australia and New Caledonia, where I got to see my dearest and oldest friend, Sophie again after 10 long years.
May – A fun girl’s weekend to San Luis Obispo.
August – Lady Gaga in concert with Leah.
August – Letters For Lucas turned one.
September – Todd started his new business, European Classic Cars on PCH.
September – I gave Seattle another shot, fell in love and got to see my friend Siobhain again after 25 years.
October – I participated in my third Susan G. Komen 3-Day Walk, second with my sister and I got to cross ‘walk over the Golden Gate Bridge’ off my Bucket List.
December – We moved to Orange County.

December – Leah and I took Lucas to Disneyland for his visit time.

Looking forward to 2011, but not a big proponent of New Year’s Resolutions per se, my goals tend to be very similar from year to year:
  • Exercise more
  • Read more
  • Cook more
  • Be present no matter what I’m doing or who I’m with. Be in the moment.

And this year, I am on a mission to declutter our home starting with Lucas’ toys and books, but more on that in another post.

What’s on your agenda for the next 364 days of the year? Let’s make ’em count!
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Green With Envy

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I’m dying.

My sister is on her way to Chicago to be an audience member on the Oprah Winfrey Show!!

Her roommate, Gina contacted the show and submitted a piece on the person she most admires and was selected to be on the show. I’m not sure if she’ll actually be on the show, but she was invited to be in the audience because it’s a topic that Oprah is covering on Tuesday, November 16.

Gina’s inspiration is her grandfather Lou, a World War II Army Veteran and the reason behind her Pin-Ups For Vets calendar project. The nostalgic 1940’s pin-up style calendars feature Gina and are sold to raise money for hospitalized Veterans, personally hand delivered by Gina to VA hospitals across the country and also sent overseas to our deployed troops.

Pin-Ups For Vets is a noble and worthwhile cause and Gina is fantastic at what she does.

Since moving to Los Angeles in January, my unemployed sister has been able to help Gina with her plight and because Gina’s dear grandfather has passed away, she generously invited Leah to accompany her to Chi-town.

Now you know why I’m dying!

What I wouldn’t give to be in Oprah’s audience… especially this year, her last season of the show. And, for the record, I’m also a bit miffed that Leah doesn’t even like Oprah. You read that right and I know what you’re thinking, “Who doesn’t like Oprah?!?!”. Nobody!

I have been a HUGE fan for 25 years and Leah has always given me @#$% for worshiping her, recording her show daily and subscribing to her magazine.

I’ve never been to a Oprah Winfrey Show taping, but have had the pleasure of hearing Ms. Winfrey speak twice and saw her every year at BookExpo when I worked for a book publisher.

So there!

While I may be a green-eyed monster, I do sincerely hope Gina’s project is featured on the show.

Have fun, girls. Oh, and if this turns out to be the “Favorite Things” episode, in which O shares (gives) products with her audience that she feels are noteworthy or that would make a great holiday gift, I fully expect first dibs on any and all swag you bring home. I would love an iPad. I’m just sayin’. 🙂

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Newborn

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I held my girlfriend’s three day old baby boy today and it reminded me of when we first had Lucas. Way back before he could walk or talk or even smile. Way back when we were still in the hospital. Those were scary and exciting days.

I remember his teeny tiny fingers and toes and glazed over eyes not yet able to see in full focus.

I remember how he would contort his chicken-like body and feeling the soft downy hair that covered it.

I remember being terrified of the delicate soft spot on his head.

I remember him suckling and having a face full of expressions he didn’t yet understand.

I remember his little bird squeaks and shutters as he tried to get comfortable in his strange new environment.

I remember trying to master the swaddle as well as breast feeding and taking turns walking and rocking and swaying and singing to him.

I remember just staring at him and thinking how amazing.

I have never loved anything more.

Congratulations, Colleen! RMG is beautiful.

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Project Smile – October

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October has become a notoriously bad month for me because it is the month my parents died three years ago and my plate right now is very full with lots of other stresses, but thanks to Alicia’s (A Beautiful Mess) Project Smile, here are 31 reasons I found to be happy this month:

1st – The kindness of strangers along the Susan G. Komen for the Cure route.
2nd – Walking across the Golden Gate Bridge. I got to cross #23 off my Buried List!
3rd – A celebratory dinner with Leah. We just walked 60 miles!!
4th – Home sweet home, coming home to Lucas. This was the longest I have ever been away from him.
5th – Pink toe nails.
6th – I made dinner!
7th – Blind (lunch) date with @surferwife.
8th – An impromptu overnight trip to Palm Springs.
9th – Coming home. Lucas didn’t fair very well in the hotel room, so none of us got any sleep.
10th – Watching Lucas’ face light up at all the trains at Travel Town in Griffith Park.
11th – Just a regular ole day where everything goes exactly according to plan.
12th – A great two-hour long workout! I love to sweat.
13th – After being in 102 degree heat at the pumpkin patch… air conditioner!
14th – A much overdue date night at one of my favorite restaurants.
15th – Five grown women making silly faces, funny noises and dancing around trying to get two toddlers to smile for pictures at the pumpkin patch and a champagne toast to two very special people.
16th – Finding a darling house with a nice big backyard and plenty of room to grow. Unfortunately, we had to let it go because we want our current house to sell first. But I know another one just like it or better is out there!
17th – Manicure, pedicure, lunch and shopping with a BFF.
18th – A jammy day! We played hookie from music class and spent the day in front of the TV.
19th – Leaving my therapist’s office after an eight month long hiatus and knowing that I’m going to be okay…eventually.
20th – Mommy & Me group mommies only get together. Where would I be without these women?
21st – I FINALLY got the oil changed in my car.
22nd – Finished one book and started and finished another!
23rd – A family bike ride. Lucas loves his helmet.
24th – We spent all day shopping for Lucas! He got new pants, shirts, shoes, bibs and a Thomas the Train set.
25th – A gift from a far away friend. Thank you, Sophie for the soap, it smells too pretty to use. xoxo
26th – A three hour long nap! Mommy was very productive today.
27th – Wine, wine and more wine with friends.
28th – Playing cars with Lucas. An entire hour flew by and I didn’t even realize it.
29th – Seeing Steeping Feet, a Dave Matthews Band tribute band.
30th – A husband who lets the mother of his child sleep in.
31st – My little Superman. And candy corn.

Be sure to link up at Alicia’s (A Beautiful Mess) Project Smile, or check out her reasons to smile this month. Her photographs are some of the most boo-tiful you will ever see. 🙂
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Pumpkin Patch Visits

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We have been to the pumpkin patch twice this month, once with my Mommy & Me group and two days later with my sister, friend Colleen, her son, sister and niece.

The first visit was to Bates Nut Farm (the same place we went last year) and it was so hot that none of the toddlers were really up for picking or posing with pumpkins. Who could blame them? 102?! In October!

Lucas did get to ride his first pony, although he wasn’t that in to it. I’m blaming the heat.These were the only two decent photos out of 70 (!) that we got:

Two days later, it rained and was even chilly. Mother Nature, I’m not sure what you’re up to, but the cooler weather made for much happier photos, that’s for sure.

This time we went to the petting zoo first….

and then Lucas came face-to-face with his first scarecrow.

It’s hard enough to get one toddler to pose and smile for the camera and downright impossible to capture two. What you don’t see in this photo are four grown women jumping and dancing all around and making funny noises behind the lens.

Nothing worked, but it was a fun Fall outing anyway. Both trips.

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A New Zip Code

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It’s official, we’re moving back to the OC!

For those of you that don’t know, Orange County is one hour north (give or take) of where we live now. When Todd and I met, I had been living in the OC for eight years. It’ll be good to be back.

Our San Diego home has been for sale for two weeks and we’ve had almost two dozen showings. We spent the weekend looking at neighborhoods and new houses and hoping, if all goes well, that we will be in a new zip code (Lord, help me!) before the first of the year.

On top of everything else I’m dealing with, a move could not be more ill-timed, but with Todd’s recent endeavor being based in Newport Beach and his need to put in more hours and the fact that all of my close friends live in Orange County, it just makes more sense for us to be there instead of here. I love our current home, our neighborhood, and the friends we’ve made in the six years we’ve lived here, but change is good and I am very excited about this one.

As much as I am dreading it; purging, organizing and packing will be cleansing. It’s amazing how much stuff one household can accumulate.

Bring on the packing tape, boxes, broken nails and late nights!!

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