annoyances

Don’t Let Your Kids Be Litter Bugs: A Halloween PSA

Posted on October 28, 2013 Written by Tonya

I like Halloween as much as the next person; seeing children scurry from house to house in the dark screaming, “trick or treat”, indulging in a treat or six myself, marveling over people’s costume creativity and since becoming a mother, attending Lucas’ preschool Halloween parade has become a huge highlight and taking him out to beg for goodies with his friends is a lot of fun.

But, I have a teeny tiny public service announcement….

The day after Halloween last year while out walking Charlie, I picked up over 70 candy wrappers in my neighborhood. It would have been more, but I only had one bag.

I was completely appalled!

Litter attracts rodents and insects and loose garbage can make it’s way to waterways and harm fish, or birds might eat it and choke, not to mention, it’s ugly to look at.

When discussing Halloween safety, PLEASE also talk to your children about littering or better yet, have them wait to dive into their treat bags until they get home.

Thank you, be safe and have fun trick-or-treating with your little pumpkins!

Pet Peeve

Posted on October 23, 2013 Written by Tonya

We have a Brittany and he is very smart.

He’s also extremely energetic, completely neurotic, overly sensitive, a disgusting poop eater, can’t be trusted with dog toys because he’ll destroy them and is too cute for words.

He adores my husband and tolerates me. I’m on his case a lot because I ~~am the only one in my house disciplining him~~ spend the most time with him.

At only a year and four months old, Charlie Pasta is still a puppy in many ways and has a lot to learn. To be fair, so do we. Dog ownership is a lot harder than I ever imagined. Turns out it is way more expensive too!

I recently took to Facebook with one of my many and easily most frustrating puppy gripes…

We are now on bed #11. Needless to say, the bitter apple spray didn’t no a damn thing to refrain this mutt.

This post was written for Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop, Prompt 4. Your pets least likable character trait.

When You See A Parent Cry

Posted on October 22, 2013 Written by Tonya

Getting in and out of the car is an ordeal for me. I always have so much to carry; shoes and socks, sweatshirts, a lone water bottle, a snack wrapper, library books, school papers, my over-sized, over-stuffed way too heavy purse, my keys dangle from one finger, a bag of groceries is cutting off circulation at my elbow, a lunch box, dry cleaning, etc., etc.

Living on the third floor of an apartment building without an elevator and being almost 27 weeks pregnant, I tend to load up in order to eliminate the number of trips I make up and down. Once I’m home, all I want to do is relax.

This afternoon was no different, my arms, shoulders and hands were full, but Lucas insisted on my carrying his Cars case as well. It’s far too heavy for him and I prefer he is hands free climbing the steps. But, what’s one more thing for me to lug I thought. Only as I went to grab for it, the handle popped off and I banged my shin into the car.

Hard.

I tried to hold back my tears, but they came anyway. Seconds after it happened, my leg was already throbbing and turning black-and-blue.

Through tears of anger and pain I said that Daddy would get the case when he got home and shuffled Lucas and my loaded up self towards the stairs. I was wearing sunglasses so I didn’t think Lucas could see my crying eyes but after he asked quietly if I was alright, he said, “Mommy, I’ve only ever seen you cry one other time”.

I remembered the first time clearly. We were laying in bed together and he had asked if he could watch one of his shows and when I said no, he told me he hated me. It stung as if he had slapped me across the face. The tears were heartfelt and I asked him never to say that to me again and explained that he could be mad at me all he wanted, but I didn’t want to hear that again.

That episode clearly made a huge impact on him and scared him.

Crying is part of being human and having emotions that evoke reactions such as crying is completely normal. I believe children should never be afraid to express their emotions, whatever they may be.

I can recall witnessing my mother cry many times, typically when saying goodbye to me for a long stint or over a grossly overacted scene in a sappy movie. I’m the same way so I was surprised when Lucas claimed to have only seen me do it one other time. When going through fertility treatments, I cried often, but most definitely hid those tears from him because I didn’t have the words to explain why I was I was so sad. Thinking back, I should have said just that, “I’m sad”.

Never once did I see my father tear up. I suppose because men are suppose to be tough and brave and manly men. The truth is, it doesn’t make a person less of a man (or women) to cry.

What do you think, should parents let their children see them cry? Has your child ever seen you or your partner cry? Have you ever seen one of your parents cry?

By the way, my shin is fine.

#ApartmentLiving

Posted on June 21, 2013 Written by Tonya

Remember a few weeks ago when I was bitching up a storm and said that I could provide an entire blog post about all the things I dislike about apartment living? Without further adieu….

The Top 10 Things I Dislike About #ApartmentLiving:

10. I’m 10 years too old for this shit! I’ve lived in my fair share of apartments (six to date beginning at age 20 in college) and it gets old real fast. There’s no privacy, lots of noise and very little space. I know it’s only temporary, but I’ve done my time in apartments and I’m over it!

9. We’re on the third floor with NO elevator (a fact that we did not learn until the day before we moved in)! Think groceries, sleeping child in the car and the transfer, etc.

8. No (personal) yard.

7. Limited storage space, resulting in not one but three separate storage units (don’t ask) including our one car garage.

6. No room for overnight guests (wait, is that really a bad thing?).

5. Our dishwasher is as big as a small Igloo ice chest, as in the size you bring to work for lunch so it gets run at least three times a week.

4. It is nearly impossible to find a parking spot after 9:30 at night. More than once I have had to park at least a 1/2 mile away from my front door.

3. We have a dog who refuses to use his porch potty (see #9).

2. We are constantly on Lucas’ case about his noise level and romping around, which is so unfair to him. He’s four and a boy and loud!

1. I mentioned the noise level, but the fights we overhear, yelling at the TV during major sporting events and pretty much constant barking dogs can really make one go crazy.

I digress… It’s not all bad! I can’t believe it’s already been three months. We have awesome swimming pools, a state of the art gym, free weekly yoga class, maintenance staff that responds quickly and we’re all together. At the end of the day, it really doesn’t matter where we live as long as we have that.

But, I’m still counting down. I have a countdown calendar running on my phone and as of this very minute, we only have 132 days left.

Provided we can find a house!!

10 Things Totally Pissing Me Off This Week

Posted on May 17, 2013 Written by Tonya

Call it hormones, the wacky weather, lack of sleep or just first world problems, here are 10 things currently pissing me off:

1. Toilet paper in public restrooms. Not only is it cheap and flimsy, why can’t I get more than one teensy square? I hate fighting with those damn dispensers!

2. Pharmacies. I wonder how much time I’ve wasted at the pharmacy this week alone; dropping off prescriptions, picking up prescriptions, arguing with pharmacists over prescriptions, waiting for prescriptions, coming back to pick up prescriptions. It’s enough to drive a person absolutely bananas!!

3. Bad parking jobs. Does anyone know how to park anymore? Twice this week I have had to climb into my car through the passenger door to get into the driver’s seat. The lines on the lot are there for a reason!!

4. Sunburns. Yep, I’m an idiot and before you ask, I was wearing SPF 55, but I guess it wore off after 5 long hours in the sun. Ouch!! Luckily, it’s only in my belly.

5. Apartment living. Enough said.

Actually, there is an entire blog post in that one, but I’ll save it for another day….

6. Poop. Specifically, people that don’t/won’t/can’t pick up after their dogs. O_o

7. Visiting blogs that make me jump through hoops to leave a comment. Math equations, Captcha quote and a check box? Just to prove I’m human? Are we still doing this? C’mon, already.

8. The punishment light. You know the one, your neighborhood has to have one, it’s the traffic light that is red no matter what direction you’re coming from and you always get stuck at it. Always!!

9. Services that just can’t be services. Regular every day, need to go places like the car wash or hair salon that have treats and snacks and ice cream and TOYS!!! Can’t I just get my car washed without having to argue with my son and say no 900 times?!

10. Customer, no service. It doesn’t matter where I go anymore, I can get no help from sales staff and they actually act like I’m just a huge burden to them. I know minimum wage is low, but please do your job.

What’s irritating you these days?

Limbo

Posted on April 5, 2013 Written by Tonya

I’m in that place.

That place between here and there.

That place where tension headaches live day after day.

That place that leaves you tossing and turning night after night.

That place where the thoughts in your head are way louder than they should ever be.

I’m stuck in a state of being lost and confused, anxious and disconnected.

That place where smiles are few and far between.

That place where you function as if on autopilot, just drifting through your life.

That place where there are too many unknowns and uncertainties, unsure whether I’m coming or going, unsettled.

It’s as though I’m living half a life with one foot firmly planted in joy and hope for a bright full future and one cemented in chaos, tough decisions, worry and tears. I’m split right down the middle and quartered into sections.

That place? It’s not a good place.

Limbo sucks.

Moving By The Numbers

Posted on March 14, 2013 Written by Tonya

1 yard sale.

2 broken finger nails.

2 trips to Home Depot.

2 guys and a truck.

3rd floor. No elevator!

4 rolls of tape.

5 days without TV or Internet (thank God for free WiFi).

5 nights of take out.

5 trips to Goodwill.

10 wardrobe boxes.

12 overpriced newspapers purchased and used to wrap ~~my precious wine glasses~~ dishes.

28 boxes.

Countless curse words uttered, trips to our storage unit and glasses of wine drank.

Have I mentioned how much I hate moving?!

But, last night in our new apartment (gulp) I slept better than I have in a long time because the hard part is behind us. I hope…

Now on to house hunting!

One red wall.

No Dogs Allowed?

Posted on February 4, 2013 Written by Tonya

Recently our landlady found out we have a puppy. We’re guessing it was the photo on our holiday card. See below.

According to our Renters Agreement, no pets are allowed. I thought my husband had cleared Charlie Pasta’s arrival with her over the summer, but apparently he did not. After berating him (my husband, not the dog) over the phone, she insisted on visiting to inspect the current condition.

We keep a neat house, despite having a toddler and a puppy. A very neat house. I’m a very ~~anal retentive, OCD, type A, controlling~~ organized person and everything in my home has a place, there is very little clutter, beds are made each morning and toys are picked up throughout the day. We have our house professionally cleaned once or twice a month, the dog is crate-trained and rarely unsupervised. He also goes to the groomer once or twice a month, in addition to being bathed at home once a week.

Even with all of the tidiness, getting ready for this woman’s visit was like a Seinfeld episode…

The day before, Todd and I were leaving town for a quick trip to Tucson to check on the work being done at the house my sister and I inheritance from our parents. I was trying to organize the details of Lucas’ care while we would be away. We don’t want either of our two trusted babysitters to be responsible for the dog too, so we decide to board him and at the same time have him neutered. 🙁

Luckily, the day before the visit was also housekeeper day, but while vacuuming, one of them pulled a snag in the carpet in our bedroom that lead to an eight inch long gaping hole.

A frantic phone call to a carpet repair specialist and $75 later the problem was solved. If you’ve ever wondered how holes in carpets are repaired, it’s much like a facelift with stretching and tugging and lots of glue! It’s a fascinating process.

What I kept thinking as we bid our son farewell for 24 hours and headed to the airport was what must a complete stranger think about us upon entering our home. What does our space reveal about us?

Our style is eclectic, mismatched pillows on the couch in our living room, dozens of books on the shelves and magazines on the bedside tables, family and car photos adorn the walls, except in Lucas’ room, which has Dr. Seuss prints and a huge Lucas Oil sign. You’ll find a treadmill and a spin bike in one room and a welcoming guest bed in the another. There are doormats at every door that leads outside. There’s a bowl of fruit on the kitchen counter next to a gourmet style coffee maker. There are several bottles of perfume on the sink in the master bathroom and tons of evidence that not only a child, but also a canine live here too.

What you can’t see when you walk through our house is that we are a family, we are responsible people, parents and pet owners and we respect where we live. Not just on drop by visit days, every day.

Although we haven’t heard from her, our landlady came and went and took our February rent check with her, so I guess we are allowed to stay. For now.

EDITED TO ADD: I guess it all comes down to the Renter’s Agreement. Today we received notice that we have 45 days to vacate. Oh joy!

Potty Mouth

Posted on December 18, 2012 Written by Tonya

If you’ve ever spent any time in real life with me then you know I have a foul mouth. Yesterday (after waiting to see my doctor for over an hour and a half and then finally deciding to get up and leave) was a particularly foul language day.

Cursing. It’s a deplorable trait.

I think I can count on one hand how many times I heard my mother use a curse word, which only makes me feel worse.

For me, cursing has become somewhat of a habit, whether it’s out of anger, frustration or to emphasize a point, sometimes there is just no substitute for “hell”, “shit”, “damn”, or worse. I have several four-letter favorites.

I have been noticing rampant potty talk in public lately too. It seems as though people have no sensor, no decorum.

Has cursing become more acceptable? I think over the years my language has gotten worse. I blame the challenges of parenthood and our six-month old puppy. But really that is no excuse.

I try to temper myself, especially around Lucas because he is a little mimic and I am ashamed to admit has dropped the F bomb more than once.

In an appropriate scenario.

In front of my in-laws.

Not one of my finer moments.

I’ve been trying to say, “what the H?”, “F this” or “F-ing that” and Lucas thinks it’s a letters game and will say, “what the K?”, “what the L?” and “J that”.

The twinkle in his eye tells me he knows better.

How do you mind your Ps and Qs around your tots?

10 Reasons NOT To Get A Puppy

Posted on December 5, 2012 Written by Tonya

Oh yeah, they’re adorable and seem like a great addition to the family, but do not be fooled, puppies are a lot of work and will try your patience in every way!

Even more than you think your children do.

I’m dead serious.

Charlie Pasta turned six months old on December 1 and after having a puppy for four months, here are the top 10 reasons I might be regretting it:

10. He digs holes in our backyard.

9. He brought me the remains of a mouse and then licked my face.

8. He continues to wake me up at 12:30, 2:30 and 4:30 with a cry worse than a newborn baby’s wanting to go out to pee or just walk around the yard for no apparent reason. Oh, no wait, there are shadows to bark at.

7. He’s jumps when I walk by him and at the jingle of keys presumably because he thinks it’s his leash and wants to go for a walk and then when I do take him for a nice long (almost 5 mile) outing along the beautiful beach, stopping to let him potty, drink water and take in the fresh ocean air, the minute we get home he looks me straight in the eye and then proceeds to pee on my carpet. If that isn’t the ultimate F-You, I don’t know what is.

6. While I was in the bathroom the other morning and left him alone for less than three minutes, he destroyed a pile of Lucas’ art projects.

5. He attacked my beloved olive tree.

4. His toys are squeakier, louder and WAY more annoying that anything Lucas has ever played with.

3. Despite (almost) daily dental care, his breath stinks all. the. time.

2. Although he has never chewed a pair of shoes, Lucas’ toys or our baseboards (knock on wood), look what he did to our vacuum cord!!

And the #1. Why puppies absolutely suck: He has weaseled his way into our family and stolen our hearts.

Don’t Let Your Kids Be Litter Bugs: A Halloween PSA

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