Jessica of Four Plus an Angel is one of my favorite bloggers.
Her loss is as deep and wide as her strength is fierce and admirable and her words never fail to take my breath away.
I am so honored to have Jessica here today sharing a letter to her mother-in-law.
To my mother-in-law,
I wonder how common it is for women to feel the tug to write to their mother-in-law as I do. Our relationship is certainly not average and, although there are many things I wish were different between us, there are no limits to what I want to thank you for.
Your son rarely talks about his childhood. I never push but once in a while find memories to paint my own picture of the mom you were. Our similarities begin with steamy mugs of tea and getting lost in books and I wish I knew where they end.
As much as I live my life through the written word, I find myself at a loss in trying to explain my gratitude to you. I remember the first memory my husband shared of you, reaching for your wig after a fall, not wanting your children to see you in such a state.
Seeing your son in my sons allows me a glimpse of the childhood you watched unfold and I wonder if there is a time you knew. If there was a day you looked at your son and knew you would never see him graduate or you lifted your daughter and knew you would not choose her next Christmas dress. I wonder how you lived with such pain and yet left your son with only visions of your strength.
In so many ways I feel I know you, although we have never met. The respect for women you instilled in your son, the familiar red hair that streaks through my daughter’s curls and the amazing pieces of your nurturing my husband delivers carefully to our own children.
Navigating the intricacies of motherhood, I am in awe of the legacy you left behind. That the path you started for your son led him to me and to fatherhood and to unending patience and overflowing love. That the love you were able to pour into a fraction of your children’s lives has carried them to the point they are today.
I can only imagine the mother you must have been and the grandmother you are to my daughter, as she sits contently in arms that were empty for far too long.
Sending you so much love,
Your daughter-in-law
My favorite picture of my mother-in-law, visiting Santa at age 4.
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Stunning, as always. xo
Beautiful. Simple. And pure. Wonderful words. I am sure she is smiling down at this letter.
I hope she is, thank you.
Jessica, beautiful letter. Just beautiful.
How sad, and how reverent of you.
I hope your husband sees this
You’re a good woman.
Wow! This is so beautiful and obviously straight from the heart. What a great letter to be forever treasured by your children and theirs…
What a beautiful letter to your mother in law Jessica.
Not only is this memorable for the respect and love you show for your mother in law, but it rings so so true to me. I owe my mother in law everything for creating the greatest husband and father I could imagine. That gratitude is daunting, isn’t it?
It is daunting, especially once we are mothers ourselves and realize what a tough job it is to do it all right.
An absolutely beautiful letter, Jessica. She would be so proud of you.
I hope she would. Thanks Kim.
Oh, Jessica. This heartbreaking. And beautiful. Just beautiful.
Thank you Katie.
Thank you so much for having me here Tonya and giving me the chance to put into words things I have wanted to say for a long time. xo
So beautiful. And touching.
Oh my. So lovely and loving.
And now I need a tissue.
This is lovely beyond words. The entire thing gave me goosebumps, and the end brought tears to my eyes.
You amaze me. All the time. Gorgeous.
What a beautiful letter.
I love the picture too… it has the look of a greeting card or something. Simple, nostalgic, and beautiful.
Beautiful writing. I am sure she is looking down and is so proud of her daughter-in-law, too 🙂 And I love the photo – looks like a vintage ad!
So lovely. Your words and your mother-in-law. That picture of her is beautiful. The innocence and delightfulness within her shines. Just like how she shines through her son, your husband. Thank you for sharing your letter.
Jessica, this is so lovely it brought tears to my eyes. I also see your letter as an invitation to me to express my gratitude to the people in my life while I have the chance. Thank you for that. xo
Oh I am so glad Kristen. I hadn’t thought about it that way but I’m glad that you did.
I love your letter and this series. I hope you show it to your husband.
I have asked him to read it ten million times and he has yet to do it. He’s not a very emotional guy so I think he’s a little worried about reading it.
Jessica, this letter is just beautiful and so beautifully written. It gave me tears.
Oh, Jessica. The idea of Hadley in her grandmother’s arms is so beautiful. Such a lovely letter, my beautiful friend. xoxo
What a beautiful tribute your mother-in-law. And it also appears to me she did a wonderful job on that hubby of yours–clearly she left her mark in ways she may never have thought possible. Thank you for introducing us to her today. And I absolutely love that photograph. XOXO
Beautiful letter, Jessica. The picture at the end and your words about her make me want to know her more, to know her story more. I get a similar feeling as the one you describe here, the kind of longing to show gratitude for someone you’ve never met, when seeing old pictures or hearing stories of my deceased grandmother. (She died when my mom was 20 years old).
I wonder if my kids will feel that way too. I wish there was more of her that we could share with them but she passed away so young.
What a lovely way to remember a lady who seems to have touched members of her family beyond her lifetime.
Jessica, this is beautiful. I really need to remind myself of this post when I disagree with my MIL.
What a lucky man to have such amazing women in his life.
First his mother, then you and finally his beautiful daughters.
You’ve captured three generations of love, gratitude and respect in one lovely letter.
This is nothing short of a gift, Jessica.
In every sense of the word.
So are you trying to make me cry in the comments??? Thank you Julie, thank you so much.
Jessica, this is amazing. What a wonderful letter to write, to show the love of your mother-in-law and how it has trickled down through your family.
My word, that was lovely. Perfect, inspirational as so much of your writing is. What a beautiful letter. What a beautiful feeling.
What a beautiful letter. I agree with @letterforlucas that you are one of my favorite bloggers, if not the favorite. The strength and character that comes out in your talented writing is inspiring.
What an amazing compliment, thank you so much.
Oh, this is beautiful….just so touching.
She would have loved you, Jessica.
What a beautiful letter – thank you for sharing it. Take care.
Oh hon…so incredibly beautiful. xo
This is so beautiful, Jessica. More than anyone else I read, there always comes a point in your posts when my throat catches and the tears well up and I let out an audible sob. You evoke such emotion in your words.
Writing is so therapeutic for me. Sorry to stir up the tears but I am glad that this post touched you.
Oh Jessica, Oh my goodness..this is beyond perfect. I am just swimming in teary eyes and a full heart…you captured all those words and I’m so glad she got to hear them here from you. xo
I have always wanted to tell her all these things, so grateful to Tonya for giving me the chance to do it in her space.
What a beautiful tribute to what sounded like a pretty awesome woman.
I’m sure she is watching all of her babes from above. Even though she wasn’t here physically to do all those things.
xoxo
So very beautiful. Thank you for inspiring me. I believe a letter to my MIL is in order.
Aww, so glad. Thanks for reading.
So beautiful. So sorry you didn’t get to know her but so glad she left those gifts.
Your letter was a loving tribute. As always Jessica, your writing is honest and from the heart.
I love reading your writing, Jessica; it flows so simply, yet is so complex. It was nice to see you at the holiday party last night!
This letter definitely had me teary-eyed! Ah! Life is just unfair and cruel sometimes. I am so sorry that you never got the chance to know this woman. She sounds like an incredibly kind and thoughtful mother.
Oh, this is beautiful. It really is.
And it makes me ache a bit that I don’t feel that way about my mother-in-law.
And makes me question whether I need to give her more credit than I do…