A two-year old has no concept of In just a minute or I’ll be right there.
Making beds, sorting laundry and loading and unloading the dishwasher mean nothing to a toddler.
Mommy and Daddy are talking right now, I’m on the phone and Let me just sit for a minute go in one ear and out the other when you’re in search of a playmate. And the repetitive nature of the request: Mommy come play? is enough to drive one insane.
When you’re a child, you want Mommy and Daddy’s attention NOW! Not five minutes from now, not AFTER you pee, NOW!
Even though you have a child, there are still household chores to be done, sanity keeping activities and basic grooming that are required. Children could care less.
Lately I’ve noticed that when I devote time to Lucas, giving him my 100% undivided attention and really play with him; like get down on the ground and line up cars or build a new train track or color one page in a coloring book while he colors the opposite side, something miraculous happens… happiness emerges along with a fluidity that wasn’t there before.
The real beauty is that it doesn’t even have to be that much time; 20 minutes here, 20 minutes there and the mommy guilt subsides and tasks around the home can still be accomplished, including brushing my teeth.
I have also come to learn that it is mandatory to spend an entire day in jammies and dance and sing in the living room, make a big mess and eat pasta without a fork.
The dishes will always be there. Sigh…
This is my 700th Letters For Lucas post! How did that happen?
Alison@Mama Wants This says
You’re so right! I find that if I devote myself 100% in spurts to the Monkey, that’s more than enough for him. And it’s easy to do 🙂
Tonya says
It’s SO easy to do! And ends up being fun for both of us.
Practical Parenting says
So true, often 20 mins is all it takes! And there is just always laundry.
Tonya says
Our days are full of many many many 20 minute increments.
Kir says
Oh Tonya, truer words were never written. I find that even when I give just a little , (esp now when I’ve been writing seemingly constantly…) And take a break, read a book, give a hug, sing a song, play chase for a moment…my sons open up, they say to me “it’s time to go write your book now mommy” and they love me more….and I love them with my whole he art because they are giving me the gift. It’s so amazing isn’t it to see them learn the art of compromie and then share it with us .
Loved this sweet friend. Xo
Tonya says
Thanks, friend. All those special moments add up to a beautiful relationship.
Robbie says
i am all for pajama days!! When I was a WOHM I found that if I gave each of my kiddos my undivided attention for 10-15 minutes when we first got home I could then make dinner in peace.
Tonya says
I do it all day long and it makes a huge difference.
Leah says
Ah, a day in jammies all day long sounds amazing!! 🙂
Tonya says
I’m a BIG fan!
Tim@sogeshirts says
Sounds awesome Tonya. It’s important to take time out to hang out like that. Nothing wrong with jammie time either sometimes. Glad Lucas enjoys all the extra attention.
Tonya says
Thanks, Tim. Lucas definitely does not lack attention.
Shell says
Those dishes really aren’t going anywhere. Have some fun with your son! 🙂
Tonya says
I would so much rather play Legos or read a book than fold laundry or scrub a pan.
Jessica says
I’m trying to do this more. It’s a struggle for me because I always have things to do but I only get this time with my kids once.
Tonya says
That’s just it and every day seems to move just a little bit faster, doesn’t it?
Galit Breen says
I love this girl, so much! And yes, this is exactly how it is- a little connecting time goes a long way for all of us, yes?
And 700 posts?! Go you!!
Tonya says
Indeed… xo
Coreen says
Such a good reminder that we need to set aside the chores and the bills and the adult stuff and spend focused quality time doing soemthing the kids want to do and really connect. The deserve it, need it and so do we. Thanks Tonya!
Elizabeth says
Have to say one of my favorite things to do with my girls is sing and dance in the living room! I hope they love it even when they’re sixteen. =)
Robin @ Farewell, Stranger says
I really, really need to learn this lesson. I keep hearing people say it, but I need to actually do it.
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